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Writing Samples
Band 6

The table below gives information about rail transport in four countries in 2007. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main deatures, and make comparisions where relevant. Write atleast 150 words.

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The table gives information on rail transport in four countries, including
Malaysia
Use synonyms
,
Canada
Use synonyms
,
China
Use synonyms
, and the
UAE
Use synonyms
, in 2007.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is evident that the
number
Use synonyms
 of people using rail transport in
China
Use synonyms
 was higher than in other countries.
China
Use synonyms
 was
also
Linking Words
 the leading country in passenger
kilometres
Use synonyms
 per head of population. Meanwhile,
Canada
Use synonyms
 was the dominant country in the cargo carried category. Regarding the
number
Use synonyms
 of people using rail transport,
China
Use synonyms
 registered the highest
number
Use synonyms
 at 27
million
Use synonyms
, followed by
Malaysia
Use synonyms
 and the
UAE
Use synonyms
 at 5.9 and 5.5
million
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.
However
Linking Words
,
Canada
Use synonyms
 represented the lowest
number
Use synonyms
 at 0.3
million
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. Concerning passenger
kilometres
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 per head of population,
China
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 was again the primary country at 1980
kilometres
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,
while
Linking Words
Malaysia
Use synonyms
 and the
UAE
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 demonstrated 770 and 780
kilometres
Use synonyms
, respectively.
By contrast
Linking Words
,
Canada
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 was the lowest at 80
kilometres
Use synonyms
.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
,
Canada
Use synonyms
 registered the highest amount of cargo carried at 28.2 billion tons,
whereas
Linking Words
China
Use synonyms
 and
Malaysia
Use synonyms
 registered 23.01 and 22.2 billion tons.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the
UAE
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 represented the smallest figure at 21.9
million
Use synonyms
 tons.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 88%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words malaysia, canada, china, uae, number, kilometres, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "gives" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "represented" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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