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Writing Samples
Band 5

Do you think that modern technology, such as the internet and computers will ever replace the book or the written word as the main source of information? Give reasons for your answer using your own ideas and experience.

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Introduction
There is an ongoing debate about whether modern technology,
such
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 as the internet and
computers
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computers,
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 will ever replace the book or the written
words
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word
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 as the major
source
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 of
information
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.
While
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 modern technology has made it convenient for
people
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 to
access
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 a wide range of
information
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 in a more effective and cost-effective way, I tend to believe that printed
books
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 will remain the primary
source
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 of
information
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, as they are more reliable than digital forms.
Body paragraph 1
On the one hand, digital
books
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 and online platforms have enabled
people
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 to
access
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information
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 worldwide within minutes, allowing them to read
books
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 from the comfort of their
home
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homes
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 regardless of geographical barriers.
This
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 convenience has led to digital
books
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 becoming the most popular
source
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 of
information
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.
Moreover
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, online platforms have provided
people
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 with valuable opportunities to
access
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 online libraries without spending too much, making these forms of
books
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 more affordable for
people
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 from diverse socioeconomic backgrounds.
For instance
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, voice audiobooks are becoming widely attractive, as they allow
people
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 to deepen their understanding of various subjects
while
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 enabling them to perform their simple tasks.
This
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 form of reading
had
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has
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 made
reading
Correct article usage
the reading
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 process more engaging and enjoyable.
Hence
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,
due to
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 the convenience digital
books
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 offer, they may replace printed
books
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.
Body paragraph 2
Despite the fact that digital
books
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 are more likely to be affordable and convenient to
access
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,
people
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 will still consume printed
books
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. Printed
books
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often
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are often
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 supervise with professional editors, evaluating
information
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 critically before publishing them.
This
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 supervision makes printed
books
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 and written words more reliable and trustworthy.
As a result
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,
people
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 will use conventional
books
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 to broaden their knowledge.
For example
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,
numerous
Correct determiner usage
much of the
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information
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 which is published on social media often leads to misunderstanding and
misleading
Replace the word
misinterpretation
 because there is
not
Rephrase
no
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 appropriate supervision on
them
Fix the agreement mistake
it
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.
This
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 scarcity makes
people
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 avoid consuming
such
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information
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.
Thus
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, as printed
books
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 and written
information
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 are more reliable, they will remain the primary
source
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 of
information
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.
Conclusion
To sum up
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, from my perspective,
although
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 digital
books
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 and online
information
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 are more affordable and accessible, printed
books
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 are widely regarded as a reliable
source
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 of
information
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,
due to
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 the appropriate supervision
on
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of
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 them.
Therefore
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, despite digital
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books
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books'
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 remarkable features, in my view, printed
books
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 and written
information
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 will remain the major
source
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 of
information
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.

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Task response
State your main view more clearly. You say books will stay the main source, but you also say digital books may replace them. Explain why trust is more important than low cost and easy use.
Task response
Develop the key idea about trust. Say why edited books are checked, and why this makes them safer for study, work, or health facts.
Task response
Use a more direct example. For example, a student may use a web post for quick facts, but use a school book or a trusted book for important work.
Coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, two main parts, and an end. Keep this plan, but make each part focus on one clear point.
Coherence and cohesion
Some links are not fully clear. The line about audio books and doing simple tasks does not strongly show that online sources will replace books. Link each example back to your main point.
Coherence and cohesion
Use clear linking words, but do not repeat the same idea. You can use “however”, “because”, “for this reason”, and “in contrast” to show the change between ideas.
Coherence and cohesion
Check unclear word groups. For example, write “Printed books are usually checked by professional editors” instead of “Printed books often supervise with professional editors.”
Coherence and cohesion
Use one word form all the way through. Choose “printed books” or “paper books”, and choose “online information” or “digital sources”, so your ideas are easy to follow.
Task response
You answer the question directly and give a clear view that printed books will still be important.
Task response
You include both sides: online sources are fast and low cost, while printed books are more trusted.
Coherence and cohesion
The main parts are in a good order: online sources first, printed books next, then a short ending.
Coherence and cohesion
Your ending repeats your main view and brings the essay to a clear close.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • replace
  • main source
  • information
  • modern technology
  • internet
  • computers
  • knowledge
  • learning
  • physical books
  • reliable
  • quick access
  • speed
  • students
  • workers
  • e-books
  • convenience
  • stored
  • devices
  • false information
  • reliable
  • trustworthy
  • experts
  • decline
  • critical thinking
  • coexist
  • advantages
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