As children become adults, their social behaviour changes in some ways. What are the main differences between young children’s social behaviour and that of adults? To what extent are the changes that take place good? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Passing from childhood
life
to adult life
involves significant changes
in societal treatment. In this
essay, I will point out some of those crucial changes
, as well as
the extent to which these changes
are beneficial. The reasons for this
are as follows.
One significant change that takes place with ageing is the decrease in the level of reliance on other people
. According to
research done in 2019, 9 in every 10 children rely on other people
quickly and easily, as is obvious when making friends with their peers or connecting with other strange adults. Whereas
, getting older makes people
reluctant to trust and cautious when relating to others. Moreover
, financial and societal status have the least importance for children, while
this
is such
a substantial factor for adults when making friends. Finally
, I feel that people
at younger ages have a simpler attitude toward life
's issues.
Admittedly, I believe that these changes
are essential and will be beneficial to people
in later life
. Of course, such
a childish attitude towards life
seems comfortable; however
, imagine the disadvantageous consequences that would occur if people
continued to trust strangers easily. Nonetheless
, I would contend that some of these changes
are negative. Overemphasizing financial and societal status prevents people
from making friends based on mutual goals and objectives, leading to loneliness and other social challenges. In accordance to a report by the World Health Organization in 2020, social isolation among adults has risen significantly in recent years, partly due to
the growing tendency to base relationships on materialistic criteria.
By way of conclusion, getting older may be accompanied by positive or negative modifications to social behaviours. I think holding educational campaigns warning parents about these changes
would be justified.Submitted by golriiz.azizi1991 on
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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to illustrate your points, such as personal anecdotes or well-documented cases.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a smooth flow between paragraphs by connecting ideas more seamlessly, possibly using transitional phrases.
coherence cohesion
Presented a clear structure with a strong introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
The essay addressed the prompt comprehensively, highlighting key differences between childhood and adulthood social behavior.
task achievement
The essay contains insightful observations about changes in social behavior from childhood to adulthood.
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