In many countries, young people are leaving their homes in the countryside to live in large cities. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

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Introduction

In many countries, increasing numbers of young

people

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are moving from rural areas to large

cities

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Although

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this

Linking Words

trend can create problems

such

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as overcrowding and higher living costs, I believe that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages because

cities

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offer greater

employment

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, education and

healthcare

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opportunities.

Body paragraph 1

On the one hand, moving to large

cities

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can provide young

people

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with better opportunities for

employment

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and personal development. Major urban areas usually contain a wider range of companies, industries and professional services than rural communities.

For example

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, a young university graduate may move to a city to obtain an engineering or business job

that is

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not available in his or her home village.

This

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can provide a higher income and valuable experience for future career development.

Cities

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also

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tend to offer better access to universities, training centres and specialised

healthcare

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As a result

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, migration can help young adults improve both their professional prospects and their quality of life.

Body paragraph 2

On the other hand

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, large-scale migration to

cities

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can create several problems. A rapid increase in population may raise demand for housing, which can make accommodation expensive and contribute to overcrowding. Traffic congestion may

also

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become more serious when a large number of

people

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commute within the same urban area.

Nevertheless

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, these disadvantages can be reduced through effective urban planning, affordable housing and reliable public transport.

Moreover

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, the benefits of better

employment

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, education and

healthcare

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can have a lasting effect on young

people

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's future.

Therefore

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although

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rural-to-urban migration creates pressure on

cities

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, its advantages are greater when appropriate planning is in place.

Conclusion

In conclusion,

although

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the movement of young

people

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cities

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can cause overcrowding, high housing costs and traffic problems, I believe that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Better

employment

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, education and

healthcare

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opportunities can significantly improve young

people

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's future prospects.

abubakker.siddique898

Sep 30, 2026

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task response

Your answer clearly says that the good points are stronger than the bad points, and it stays with this view from start to end. To make it even stronger, explain more fully why the good points matter more than the city problems.

task response

Your ideas are clear and cover jobs, study, health care, homes, and traffic. Add one more real or more exact example, such as how a young person’s pay or skills may help their family in the country.

coherence and cohesion

The essay is easy to follow. The first main part gives good points, the next gives bad points, and the end repeats your main view. This clear order works very well.

coherence and cohesion

You use linking words well, such as “On the one hand”, “On the other hand”, “As a result”, and “Nevertheless”. For an even smoother flow, use fewer links in one part and make some links more direct.

coherence and cohesion

Each main paragraph has a clear main idea and support. The last part of the second main paragraph is a little long; split it into two shorter parts so the final point is easier to read.

task response

You answer every part of the question and give a clear view that the good points are greater than the bad points.

task response

The example of a young person moving for an engineering or business job is useful and fits the main idea well.

coherence and cohesion

The opening and ending clearly show the main view, so the reader always knows your answer.

coherence and cohesion

Your paragraphs are in a strong order, and each one stays focused on one main group of ideas.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

298 words

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In many countries, young people are leaving their homes in the countryside to live in large cities. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineer, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people suggest that bringing up children by thw whole family includimg uncles, aunts and grandparents is better, rather than only by parents. To what extend are you agree or disagree?

It has been suggested that cars and public transport should be banned from city centres and only bicycles be allowed instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that people living in the twenty-first century have a better standard of living as compared to previous centuries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Many supermarkets are selling more and more products that are imported from other countries instead of selling food that is locally sourced. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development?