IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

You have an appointment with your manager the next day. Write him/her a letter about what you’re going to discuss at the meeting. In your meeting, you should tell: o What did you do for the company during the years you worked there o What changes you would like to recommend o What training you require

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Dear Mrs Ordaz, I am writing to you about the meeting next Tuesday. I would like to know the data we are going to present to the company's director in the meeting we have programmed. First of all, let me start with my achievements over
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 3 years that I have been working in the project management area. I kept track of the projects that had been delegated to me
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there were no previous records to compare the material with. Other points I want to discuss are the goals we have reached for the presentations we had with the clients, and I want to remark that they all said the informs were exceptional. I would like to know if it is possible to hire a helper,
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 I am capable of keeping track of the documents and legal material, I would like to have some help to organise everything. For my growth in the area, I have conducted some research for a Scrum master course, so that it will help me complement my skills for organising better the teams, and reaching the results we are looking for. I hope you found
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 message useful. Best regards, Jimena García.

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task response
Cover all three points more clearly. Say what you did, name the changes you want, and state the training you need. Give a short reason for each point.
task response
Use clear and correct words for your work. For example, write “reports” instead of “informs”, and say what kind of helper you need.
coherence and cohesion
Keep each paragraph on one main point. Put your past work in one paragraph, your suggested change in the next, and your training need in the last.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with simple words such as “First”, “Also”, “However”, and “Finally”. Avoid very long sentences with many ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Make the opening match the purpose of the letter. You are asking to discuss your work, changes, and training, not only asking what data will be shown.
task response
You include your work in project work, a change you want at work, and a course you would like to take.
coherence and cohesion
Your letter has a clear start, main body, and polite ending.
coherence and cohesion
You use useful paragraph breaks, so the reader can follow the main parts of your message.
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