Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning. To what extent do you agree with this opinion? How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

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Introduction

It is argued that the format of learning at primary

schools

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is too formal.

Although

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I believe that formal learning creates discipline, I fundamentally believe that extra

activities

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are crucial for pupils' growth.

Body paragraph 1

Nowadays, most

schools

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change their learning styles to be more formal in order to create discipline in

children

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's learning.

However

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this

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can be quite boring for primary

school

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children

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, as they are too young to focus on lectures for long periods

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or to adhere to strict rules.

Children

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in primary

school

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should feel safe and comfortable, because they are too sensitive at

this

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age. At

school

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, young

children

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are separated from their parents, which can create a sense of loneliness. Adding strict rules on top of

this

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may only provoke frustration and resentment.It is important to have engaging

activities

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such

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as dancing with music during the lesson

while

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learning, or playing with peers in the

school

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playground. To illustrate, it is obvious that students of

schools

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with different clubs are more likely to have a sense of attachment to their

schools

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, because they are probably not enforced by harsh rules.

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, adding interesting

activities

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children

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's learning syllabus can be more efficient in their achievements.

Body paragraph 2

Regarding plays, during their time at

school

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children

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should have 'me time' in order to refresh their minds and build up new friendships. To clarify, primary

school

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children

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are too young to be involved in formal learning. They are often impatient,

thriving

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striving

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to play and spend their time with their peers. Having extra-curricular

activities

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can not only help to make a

school

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a more attractive place for them, but

also

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can improve their focus on their lessons.

Additionally

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school

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is a place to make new connections.

In other words

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, through various

engagements

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engagements,

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children

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can

socialize

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socialise

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with their classmates

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and make stronger bonds, which can be useful in their mental wellness. Thereby, having a balanced program at

schools

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can be beneficial for

children

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's studies and social lives.

Conclusion

To sum up

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while

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I believe that formal learning can make students more disciplined, I hold the view that striking a balance between playing and learning can foster their cognitive and social skills.

cingizmammadov999

Oct 5, 2026

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task response

Answer both parts more fully. State clearly how far you agree that schools focus too much on formal learning, then explain why play matters in class.

task response

Your main view is clear: formal learning has some value, but play is very important. Make this view even stronger by saying if you agree only in some schools or in most schools.

task response

Give one real and clear example. For example, a short group game can help children learn new words, take turns, and work with others.

task response

Some ideas need more support. Do not only say that rules may make children sad; explain how a good mix of rules and play can help them learn.

coherence and cohesion

Use one main idea in each body paragraph. The first body paragraph can focus on the limits of formal learning. The second can focus on how play helps learning and making friends.

coherence and cohesion

Link ideas in a more direct way. Use simple links such as “For this reason”, “For example”, “Also”, and “As a result” only when they show a clear link.

coherence and cohesion

Avoid repeating the same point about children being too young to sit and listen for a long time. Add a new point instead, such as play helping memory, speech, or group work.

coherence and cohesion

Check small writing details. Put a space after a full stop in “resentment.It”, and use “play” rather than “plays” when you mean the activity in general.

task response

You give a clear opinion from the start and keep the same main view to the end.

task response

You discuss both formal learning and play, and you explain that play can help both learning and social life.

coherence and cohesion

The essay has a clear beginning, two body paragraphs, and an ending.

coherence and cohesion

Your ideas usually move in a clear order, and words such as “However”, “Additionally”, and “To sum up” help the reader follow the text.