Art classes, such as painting or drawing, are as important for children’s development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high school. Do you agree or disagree?
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Introduction
In recent years, the issue of
art
education has emerged as a matter of significant concern to the general public. Use synonyms
While
some individuals maintain that Linking Words
art
classes are less important than other subjects, I contend that they should be compulsory in high school. Use synonyms
This
essay aims to provide a comprehensive analysis of Linking Words
this
viewpoint.Linking Words
Body paragraph 1
On the one hand, it is essential to acknowledge the significant advantage associated with
art
classes. A crucial consideration is that Use synonyms
art
can develop childrens’ creativity, which highlights that Use synonyms
students
can express their ideas in different ways. Use synonyms
For example
, painting and drawing can encourage Linking Words
students
to use their imagination. Use synonyms
Furthermore
, Linking Words
art
can help Use synonyms
students
reduce stress, as creative activities can provide them with a relaxing break from academic studies.Use synonyms
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
, it is crucial to consider the opposing viewpoint that Linking Words
art
class should not be compulsory. A significant factor to explore is that Use synonyms
students
have different interests, which underscores that some may prefer science or mathematics. To illustrate Use synonyms
this
perspective, one might refer to Linking Words
students
who do not enjoy painting or drawing. Use synonyms
Furthermore
, it is essential to highlight that the school curriculum is already Linking Words
demending
. Correct your spelling
demanding
This
assertion is supported by the fact that Linking Words
students
need enough time to focus on other important Use synonyms
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
Conclusion
In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
students
have different interests, I believe Use synonyms
art
classes should be compulsory because they help children develop creativity, express themselves and broaden their perspective.Use synonyms
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task response
Make your main view more clear in the first part. Say that you agree that art should be a must, even though some students may not like it.
task response
Give more full reasons for your view. Explain how art helps with new ideas, self-expression, and a wider way of seeing the world.
task response
Use more real examples. For instance, explain how a drawing task can help a shy student share feelings, or how art can help a student think of new ways to solve a problem.
task response
The other side is fair, but answer it more strongly. You could say that schools can offer a small number of art hours, so students still have time for science, maths, and other work.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, two main parts, and an end. To make the flow better, make the second main part clearly show that it is the other view, then give your answer to it.
coherence and cohesion
Do not use the same long frame again and again, such as 'It is essential to' and 'A significant factor'. Use short, direct topic sentences instead.
coherence and cohesion
Link each example more closely to the point before it. After the example about painting, add a sentence that says how this builds creativity.
coherence and cohesion
Check small word errors that can make meaning less clear: use 'children's', 'demanding', 'art classes', and 'subjects' in the last sentence of the second main part.
task response
You answer both sides of the question and clearly state that art classes should be a must in high school.
task response
Your points about creativity and less stress are on topic and fit your main view.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is easy to follow because it has an introduction, two main body parts, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
You use clear linking words such as 'On the one hand', 'Furthermore', and 'In conclusion' to guide the reader.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite