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Band 4.5

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or buildings they live in. What are the reasons of this? How can people research this?

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Introduction
There is no denying the fact that the history of a
house
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 is very important.
While
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 it is a commonly held belief that some
people
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 are interested in
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search about
Wrong verb form
researching
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 the
house
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 they live in. In
this
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 essay, I will discuss the reasons and different methods
to
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of
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 research.
Body paragraph 1
To begin
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 with,
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house
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a house
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 is considered a vital thing in life, as we spend much of our
times
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time
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 inside houses.
This
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place
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 is where we gather as a family, and every corner hides
different
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a different
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 story.
Also
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, it contains valuable things
such
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 as gold, paintings, and money. So, it is essential to know more about the
place
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 you live in. Some
people
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forced
Verb problem
are forced
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 to change their houses, and that first returns to less
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search
Replace the word
searching
 they conduct about the
house
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.
For example
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, there was a teacher who decided to buy the first property he liked
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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. After living there for
couple
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a couple
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 of weeks, he discovered that his
neighbor
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neighbour
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 is
criminal
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a criminal
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, and the
neighborhood
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neighbourhood
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 has many problems.
Body paragraph 2
People
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 can use many ways to
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search
Verb problem
learn
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 more about the
house
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 they want to live in or the building. There are different applications which make the research easy, and these apps can help to know what is the safest
place
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 to live in.
In addition
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, there are
people
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 who work as investigators. Basically, their jobs to
search
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about
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for
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 what you request. So, these are different methods that may help.
Conclusion
In conclusion, I believe that
people
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 have to
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search about
Verb problem
research
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 the
place
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 they are planning to live in, and there are several reasons for that. There are
variety
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a variety
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 of methods to know the history of the houses.

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task response
Answer both parts more fully. Explain why people want to know the past of a home, such as safety, value, old events, or family links. Then explain clear ways to find this information, such as old maps, public records, past owners, local libraries, and neighbours.
task response
Keep the focus on the history of a house or building. Some ideas in the essay are about the safety of an area or a bad neighbour. These ideas can be used, but link them clearly to checking the past of the home.
task response
Develop each main idea. For example, if a home may contain valuable old items, explain how its past can show this and why it matters to the owner.
task response
Use examples that clearly support the question. The teacher example shows why people should check an area, but it does not show how or why they research the history of a building.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, two main body parts, and an ending. Make the links between ideas smoother by using simple words such as 'First', 'Also', 'For example', 'As a result', and 'Finally'.
coherence and cohesion
Make each paragraph about one main point. In the first body paragraph, the ideas about family life, hidden stories, valuable items, moving home, and crime are not closely linked. Choose two related reasons and explain them in order.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear topic sentences. For example: 'One reason is that people want to make sure their home is safe.' Then give an explanation and an example before moving to the next reason.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are hard to follow because the meaning is not clear. For example, rewrite 'Some people forced to change their houses...' in a direct way, such as: 'People who move often may not have time to check the past of a home carefully.'
task response
You answer both questions by giving reasons for research and several ways people can do it.
task response
You include a real-life style example, which shows an effort to support your point.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear four-part shape: an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Words such as 'To begin with', 'In addition', and 'In conclusion' help the reader see the main parts of your essay.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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