It is often said that crime is one of the main things that make the quality of life poorer. Crime in developed countries is one of the biggest problems in society. What are the causes of this problem and what measures can be taken to reduce it?

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Introduction
Crime has increased over the past few years
and
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, and
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it is significantly affecting the
life
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lives
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of residents in every part of the world.
This
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issue has become one of the serious problems in the developed countries which needs to be addressed by the authorities. Access to
internet
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the internet
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, unemployment and drug addiction are the major causes of criminal
activities
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.
This
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essay will discuss the causes in detail and
proposes
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propose
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key measures to avoid
it
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them
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.
Body paragraph 1
To begin
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with, an excessive interest in
the
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apply
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internet games and social websites is distracting the youngsters to get proper school education. Immature brains are becoming of fiction world
instead
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of valuable knowledge and facts that
led
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lead
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them to commit crimes. They initiate
such
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activities
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from a small level at schools
and
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, and
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then
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it becomes
henious
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heinous
with their increasing age.
Moreover
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, lack of education promotes
the
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apply
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unemployment and
disappointments
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disappointment
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in the
life
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lives
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of young people
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due
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, due
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to which they intend to join
the group
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groups
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of friends addicted to drugs. Drug addiction is another primary reason
of
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for
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criminal
activities
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when
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. When
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individuals are not able to pay for drugs, they are more likely to get into wrongdoings.
Body paragraph 2
There are numerous ways to curb these
activities
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. First of all, parents need to be watchful regarding online websites or games used by their children and the amount
if
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of
show examples
time spent on
it
Fix the agreement mistake
them
show examples
. They should encourage reading habits and help their children to focus on studies. Most importantly, students need to
guided
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be guided
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by teachers
as well as
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parents to learn to spend their leisure time productively.
Secondly
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,
government
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the government
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should impose strict laws and heavy punishments for criminals so that society learns the result of illegal
activities
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. More rehabilitation centres should be opened to help
the
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apply
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young people
to
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apply
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quit
the
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apply
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drugs.
Conclusion
To summarise, increased crime has affected the
society
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societies
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of all developed nations. All teenagers are deviated from their path
due to
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internet
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the internet
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or
wrong
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the wrong
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group of friends
which
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, which
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are the main reasons
of
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for
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indulging
into
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in
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unlawful acts.
However
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, teachers and parents can guide the young generation to focus on learning skills
and
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, and
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authorities need to put some strict laws
to
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in place to
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control these illegal
activities
Use synonyms
.

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task response
You answer both parts of the task: causes and ways to cut crime. Your main causes are clear, but some links need more care. For example, explain more clearly how too much time online can lead to crime; this is not true for all young people.
task response
Give one or two real and clear examples. For instance, you could say that job training can help young people find work, so they may not join crime groups.
task response
Some ideas are too broad, such as saying that all teenagers go off the right path. Use words like “some” or “many” instead.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear four-part plan: start, causes, ways to help, and end. Keep this plan, because it makes the answer easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear links between ideas. In the causes part, show the chain more fully: poor school work may lead to no job, then stress, then a higher risk of crime.
coherence and cohesion
Make the last paragraph match the body more closely. It should include unemployment and drug use, because these are key causes in the main part.
coherence and cohesion
Check small word errors that can slow the reader, such as “amount of time”, “need to be guided”, and “heinous”. Clear and correct word use will make the flow better.
task response
You give several causes and several actions, including family help, school help, laws, and drug care.
coherence and cohesion
Each main paragraph has one clear job, and words such as “To begin with”, “Moreover”, and “Secondly” help the reader follow your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
The opening states what the essay will discuss, and the ending gives a short summary and answer.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • crime rate
  • delinquency
  • deterrent
  • marginalized
  • recidivism
  • rehabilitation
  • socioeconomic status
  • stigmatization
  • surveillance
  • felony
  • misdemeanour
  • justice system
  • enforcement
  • sanctions
  • disenfranchised
  • peer pressure
  • substance abuse
  • white-collar crime
  • cybercrime
  • community outreach
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