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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. to what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

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Introduction
There is an ongoing argument that living in a foreign
language
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country
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 may create serious issues socially and practically. I largely agree with
statement
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the statement
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 because
language
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 is one
the
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of the
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 most significant issues among immigrants.
This
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 essay will explain the reasons behind
this
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 statement.
Body paragraph 1
To begin
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 with,
language
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 is one of the most important
basis
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bases
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 for living in a foreign
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language
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apply
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country
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 to live and survive.
This
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 is important because if someone can'
t
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 communicate
the
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in a
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language
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, they might
face
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 many
languages related
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language-related
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 challenges in their daily
basis
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apply
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life.
For example
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, if someone
don'
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doesn't
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t
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 know the
language
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, they might not be able to find their address, or
doing
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do
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 the official
paperworks
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paperwork
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, or even their daily shopping.
Moreover
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, they might
face
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 difficulties with the laws of the new
country
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due to
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lack
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a lack
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 of
language
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profeciency
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proficiency
.
Body paragraph 2
Another reason which might be
crutial
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crucial
 is
finding
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that finding
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 a job can be tough or even impossible for them. Because if you want to work
anywhere
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anywhere,
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 you need to communicate with people
and
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, and
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 without knowing the
language
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, it can be
unachiveable
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unachievable
.
Furthermore
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, people who move to a
country
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 with diffirent
language
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 can
face
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 many barriers with
thier
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their
 education and learning new skills.
As a result
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, we can see how important
can be the languge
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the language can be
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 if we live in a
foriegn
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foreign
country
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. It is a bridge to get into work, education, and their culture. To illustrate
with
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apply
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, living in an English
language
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country
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 might be tough if we can'
t
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 communicate in English
and
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, and
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 it will take
for
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apply
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individuals to learn the
language
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while
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 they
living
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are living
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 in that specific
country
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.
Conclusion
In conclusion, it is difficult to live in a
foriegn
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foreign
language
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country
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 if we don'
t
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 know the
language
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so
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, so
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 that we might be
prepare
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prepared
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 for the challenges we might
face
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but
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, but
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 there is the possibility of learning the
language
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 as soon as possible for
better
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a better
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 life.

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task response
State your view more clearly in the first paragraph. You say you largely agree, but explain how far you agree and why both social and practical problems can happen.
task response
Write more about social problems. Your essay mainly explains daily life, work, and study. Add ideas such as feeling alone, not making friends, or not joining local life.
task response
Develop each main idea with a clear cause and result. For example, poor language skills can make it hard to speak with workmates, which can make a new person feel left out.
task response
Use a more real and clear example. The example about English-speaking countries is too general. Describe one person who cannot speak to a doctor, teacher, or landlord.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear beginning, two body paragraphs, and an ending. Make the first body paragraph about social problems and the second one about practical problems so the plan matches the question.
coherence and cohesion
Start each paragraph with one clear main idea. Some sentences repeat that language is important, rather than adding a new point.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words carefully. Words like 'For example', 'As a result', and 'However' can help, but make sure the next sentence clearly follows the one before it.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid long sentences with many ideas. Split them into shorter sentences so the reader can follow your meaning more easily.
task response
You answer the question and give a clear general view that language problems can make life hard in a new country.
task response
You include useful practical areas, such as shopping, official forms, work, education, and learning new skills.
coherence and cohesion
The essay follows a basic essay shape with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
You use some helpful signposts, such as 'To begin with', 'Moreover', 'Furthermore', and 'In conclusion'.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • linguistic proficiency
  • cross-cultural communication
  • miscommunication
  • social integration
  • linguistic alienation
  • cultural dissonance
  • language acquisition
  • communication breakdown
  • interpreter services
  • language courses
  • bilingualism
  • multilingualism
  • language barrier
  • effective communication
  • cultural assimilation
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