Some people suggest that bringing up children by thw whole family includimg uncles, aunts and grandparents is better, rather than only by parents. To what extend are you agree or disagree?

5.0 / 9

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Introduction

MANY PEOPLE BELIEVE THAT TAKING

CARE

Use synonyms

CHILDREN

Use synonyms

SHOULD BE ACCOMPANIED BY THE WHOLE FAMILY

INCULDING

Correct your spelling

INCLUDING

UNCLES, AUNTS AND GRANDPARENTS, BECAUSE IT WILL PROMOTE

GROWTH

Use synonyms

RATE AND HAPPINESS AROUND THE

CHILD

Use synonyms

. I AGREE WITH THE STATEMENT, AS IT WILL BRING A SENSE OF SECURITY AND COMFORT.

Body paragraph 1

TO EMBARK UPON, IF THE UPBRINGING OF THE

CHILDREN

Use synonyms

INVOLVES THE FAMILY,

THEN

Linking Words

IT WILL HELP IN PROMOTING A BETTER

GROWTH

Use synonyms

RATE.

ALSO

Linking Words

THIS

Linking Words

WILL FOSTER A SENSE OF SECURITY

AND

Punctuation problem

, AND

show examples

CHILD

Use synonyms

FEELS HAPPY

WHILE

Linking Words

DOING SO.

THUS

Linking Words

, IT HELPS IN THE

OVERALL

Linking Words

GROWTH

Use synonyms

FACTOR AND IT CREATS A ENVIRONMENT IN WHICH

CHILDREN

Use synonyms

SHOULD BE RELAXED AND FEEL COMFORT AT THE SAME TIME.

FOR INSTANCE

Linking Words

, IF A

CHILD

Use synonyms

IS CARED FOR BY GRANDPARENTS,

THEN

Linking Words

THE

CHILD

Use synonyms

FELL STRONG CONNECTION WITH THE ROOTS AND BETTER

GROWTH

Use synonyms

IS ACHIEVED BY THEM.

THEREFORE

Linking Words

, IT IS IMPORTANT TO INVOLVED COMPLETE FAMILY IN THE

CHILD

Use synonyms

CARE

Use synonyms

Body paragraph 2

ALSO

Linking Words

, HAVING GUIDANCE FROM THE FAMILY REDUCES THE STRESS LEVEL AMONG THE

PARENTS

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. AS SOME

PARENTS

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ARE WORKING AND THEY

WERE

Wrong verb form

ARE

show examples

NOT ABLE TO LOOK AFTER THEIR

Use synonyms

CHILD

Check wording

CHILDREN

show examples

THIS

Linking Words

SOMETIME CAUSE UNPROPER

CARE

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OF A

CHILD

Use synonyms

. SO, INCLUDING FAMILY MEMBERS WILL REDUCE THE PRESSURE FACTOR AMONG

PARENTS

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. THEY CAN WORK WITHOUT ANY KIND OF TENSION. TO EPITOMISE,

PARENTS

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WHO GO TO THE OFFICE ON A REGULAR BASIS WERE NOT ABLE TO PROVIDE

CARE

Use synonyms

TO THEIR

CHILDREN

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, BUT IF THEY LIVE IN A LARGE FAMILY,

THEN

Linking Words

THIS

Linking Words

WILL RESOLVE THE PROBLEM.

THEREFORE

Linking Words

, HAVING

FAMILY

Add an article

A FAMILY

show examples

IS BENEFICIAL FOR WORKING

PARENTS

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IN PROMOTING THE GOOF HEALTH .

Conclusion

IN CONCLUSION, INVOLVING FAMILY IN THE UPBRINGING OF A

CHILD

Use synonyms

WILL SHOW BENEFICIAL RESULTS, AND

THIS

Linking Words

WILL

ALSO

Linking Words

PROMOTE HAPPINESS ,

GROWTH

Use synonyms

RATE AND SENSE OF SECURITY.

sc102219

Oct 20, 2026

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task response

Make your view more clear in the first part. Say that you agree that the wider family should help, but parents should still have the main role.

task response

Develop each main idea more fully. Explain how grandparents and other family members can give love, time, life lessons, and help when parents are at work.

task response

Use more real and clear examples. For example, a grandparent can collect a child from school, help with meals, and tell family stories.

task response

Be careful with broad claims such as “better growth rate”. Explain what kind of growth you mean, such as social skills, good behavior, or emotional health.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has a clear start, two body parts, and an ending. Make each body part focus on one main idea only.

coherence and cohesion

Use simple linking words in a natural way: “First”, “For example”, “As a result”, and “However”. Do not begin too many sentences with “Also” or “Therefore”.

coherence and cohesion

Avoid repeating the same ideas and words, such as “growth”, “security”, and “family”. Add new details instead of saying the same point again.

coherence and cohesion

Make the last sentence of each body part clearly link back to the question. This will help the reader follow your view.

task response

You give a clear opinion and keep this opinion from the start to the end.

task response

You use two relevant ideas: children can feel safe with family help, and working parents can get support.

coherence and cohesion

The essay has a clear basic shape: an introduction, two main parts, and a conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

Examples about grandparents and working parents are linked to your main ideas.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

279 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

extended family
child-rearing
diverse experiences
harmonious family environment
sense of belonging
emotional support
wisdom and guidance
multicultural societies
heritage and traditions
conflicts and confusion

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Some people suggest that bringing up children by thw whole family includimg uncles, aunts and grandparents is better, rather than only by parents. To what extend are you agree or disagree?

While your friend was away on vacation, you stayed in his apartment. While you were there, you dropped an expensive bowl and broke it. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter - explain what happened, - apologise for the accident, - tell your friend what you plan to do about the bowl.

Some people feel that manufactures and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of foods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus more on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Television sports program shows such Olympic are a good source of motivation for youths who do not like to exercise much. Do you agree or disagree include examples in your answer and provide your owns opinion.