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Band 7.5

Technology can be used for almost everything, but it should not be used for everything. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

7.5 / 9
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Introduction
Whether
technology
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 should be used for almost everything remains a subject of considerable debate.
While
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 some
people
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 argue that
technology
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 makes daily life easier, others believe that it should not be used for everything.
This
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 essay will examine both perspectives before explaining why I believe
technology
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 should be used in a balanced way.
Body paragraph 1
On the one hand, supporters of using
technology
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 in almost every aspect of life argue that it makes daily activities easier and more efficient.
This
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 is mainly because modern devices allow
people
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 to communicate quickly, access information, and complete tasks in less time.
For example
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, students can attend online classes,
while
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 doctors can use digital tools to diagnose illnesses and monitor patients.
As a result
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,
people
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 can save time and improve their productivity.
Therefore
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, it is understandable why many
people
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 believe that
technology
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 should be widely used.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
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, others argue that
technology
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 should not be used for everything. The main reason is that excessive dependence on
technology
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 can reduce practical skills and face-to-face communication.
Although
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technology
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 offers many benefits,
people
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 should still perform daily tasks themselves and maintain meaningful relationships.
For instance
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, someone who uses a map application for every journey may struggle to find a location when their phone battery dies.
Consequently
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, they may become less independent.
Furthermore
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, teaching children and caring for elderly
people
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 require human attention, empathy, and understanding. For these reasons, I tend to agree with those who believe that
technology
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 should be used in a balanced way.
Conclusion
In conclusion, both views have their own merits.
However
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, I believe that
technology
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 should be used in a balanced way because excessive dependence can weaken practical skills and personal relationships. Ultimately,
technology
Use synonyms
 should support our daily lives rather than replace essential human activities.

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task response
You discuss both sides and give a clear view. To make your ideas stronger, add one more clear reason for each side and explain it a little more.
task response
Your examples are useful. You could make them more real by showing how a doctor’s tool helps a patient, or how too much phone use can hurt a close talk.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, two main parts, and a clear end. Each part stays on one main idea, so it is easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
You use links such as “For example”, “As a result”, and “On the other hand” well. Try not to use “Therefore” and “Consequently” too often; use simple links like “so” or “because” at times.
coherence and cohesion
The last line gives a strong final view. You can make the end even better by bringing back the two main points: human skills and human care.
task response
You answer all parts of the question: you show both views and clearly say that technology should be used in a balanced way.
task response
Your point about children and older people is strong because it shows that some work needs care, feeling, and human contact.
coherence and cohesion
The order of ideas is very clear: benefits first, then problems, then your own view.
coherence and cohesion
Your topic sentences clearly tell the reader what each main part will discuss.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • technological advancement
  • everyday convenience
  • instant communication
  • access to information
  • remote healthcare
  • online learning
  • work remotely
  • automate routine tasks
  • human interaction
  • face-to-face communication
  • human judgement
  • emotional support
  • over-reliance on technology
  • loss of independence
  • data privacy
  • personal information
  • digital divide
  • job displacement
  • make informed decisions
  • a balanced approach
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