IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Some people believe that university education should be free for all students, regardless of their financial background. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

3.0 / 9
Band scoreView breakdown ↓
✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
Introduction
In many
countries
Use synonyms
 the university education is completely free, whether you can afford it or not. I partly agree
to
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 university
eduction
Use synonyms
 to be free for all students in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
countries
Use synonyms
 that can, but in
the low economy
Correct word choice
low-income
show examples
Use synonyms
countries
Add a comma
countries,
show examples
 I think it should be free to
whom
Correct pronoun usage
those who
show examples
 can not afford it.
Body paragraph 1
First,
Linking Words
universty
Correct your spelling
university
 should be free in the rich
countries
Use synonyms
 because I believe in equality,
also
Linking Words
 if the country can easily afford it
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
 why not.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
 the other hand, the poor
countries
Use synonyms
 cannot afford
an
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 completely free
eduction
Use synonyms
 so equality here is not
fear
Use the right word
fair
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, my arguments from the outside
seems
Correct subject-verb agreement
seem
show examples
 contradictory, but in some cases equality
in
Verb problem
is
show examples
 not fear.
For example
Linking Words
, in many rich contries rich people pay high taxes to get free services, so I think free
universty
Correct your spelling
university education
eduction
Use synonyms
 is important, as the people pay high
taxes
Punctuation problem
taxes,
show examples
 the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 must return it as free services
including
Punctuation problem
, including
show examples
Use synonyms
eduction
Correct your spelling
education
.
Conclusion
In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
poor
countries
Use synonyms
, I think that university should not be free for all students. In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
 financial background should be considered, because they have limited resources, so
if
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
those who can afford it must pay
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 those
cannot
Correct pronoun usage
who cannot
show examples
 must take the support
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
 the opportunity for
Use synonyms
eduction
Correct your spelling
education
 will be
avalible
Correct your spelling
available
 for most people
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 the
resoures
Correct your spelling
resources
 will be used as best as
can
Correct word choice
possible
show examples
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Your main view is clear: free university is good in rich countries, but help should go first to students who cannot pay in poor countries. State this view more directly in the first paragraph and repeat it in a short final paragraph.
task response
Give more detail about why this plan is best. For example, explain how free study can help more young people get jobs, and how paying students can help poor countries keep good schools.
task response
Your example about high tax in rich countries is useful. Make it more clear by showing the link: people pay more tax, so the state has more money to pay for university.
coherence and cohesion
Use a clear four-part plan: introduction, rich countries, poor countries, and conclusion. This will make your answer easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple link words carefully: “First,” “However,” “For example,” “As a result,” and “In conclusion.” Do not use “on the other hand” unless you are clearly showing a different side.
coherence and cohesion
Some ideas are joined in very long sentences. Make them shorter. For example: “Poor countries have limited money. Therefore, they should help students from low-income families first.”
coherence and cohesion
Check key words and keep the same form: “education,” “university,” “government,” “countries,” “cannot,” and “fair.” Clear spelling helps the reader follow your ideas.
task response
You answer both parts of the issue by comparing rich and poor countries.
task response
You give a clear reason based on limited public money and support for students who cannot pay.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has two main body paragraphs, and each paragraph has one main idea.
coherence and cohesion
You use some helpful link words, such as “First,” “However,” and “For example.”
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: