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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that families of politicians should not be allowed to study or seek medical attention abroad. Do you agree or disagree?

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Introduction
**Introduction**
Body paragraph 1
Families
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 of
politicians
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 should have the same rights as other citizens. Some
people
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 believe that
people
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 who are related to
politicians
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 should not be allowed to study or receive medical
treatment
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 abroad.
However
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, I strongly disagree with
this
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 idea because everyone should have equal rights, regardless of their family background.
Body paragraph 2
**Body paragraph 1**
Body paragraph 3
Nowadays, studying abroad has become more common, as young
people
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 are looking for better
opportunities
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 in different fields and universities around the world.
This
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 is important because the job market is becoming increasingly competitive. Many countries offer
opportunities
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 for international students to gain knowledge and experience different cultures.
For example
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, the United States has some of the world's most prestigious universities,
such
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 as Harvard. Having a degree from a well-known university can help
people
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 improve their CVs and find better job
opportunities
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.
Therefore
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,
politicians
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'
families
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 should have the same opportunity to study abroad as everyone else.
Body paragraph 4
**Body paragraph 2**
Body paragraph 5
Moreover
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, medical
treatment
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 may sometimes be better or more accessible in other countries, particularly for
people
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 from less developed countries. Some patients may need to travel abroad to receive specialised
treatment
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 for serious diseases. I believe that everyone has the right to receive appropriate medical care and fight diseases, even if they need to travel to another country.
However
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, when
politicians
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'
families
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 travel abroad, there should be transparency regarding payments, especially if public money is used.
This
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 would help ensure that government funds are not spent on personal expenses without proper justification.
Body paragraph 6
**Conclusion**
Conclusion
To conclude
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, studying and receiving medical
treatment
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 abroad can be important for
people
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's lives and future
opportunities
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. I strongly believe that
politicians
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'
families
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 should not be prohibited from doing these things.
However
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,
politicians
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 must be transparent about public spending to ensure that taxpayers' money is used appropriately.

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task response
Your view is clear from the start and stays the same. To make it stronger, explain more fully why a ban would be unfair. For example, say that a person should not lose a right only because of who their parent is.
task response
The point about public money is useful, but it is not the main question. Keep the main focus on whether study and care abroad should be banned. You could add that checks on public money are better than a full ban.
task response
Use a more direct example for medical care. For instance, a child may need a kind of care that is not given at home. This would make your reason more real and clear.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear order: opening, two main parts, and ending. Keep this plan, as it makes your writing easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
The links between ideas are clear, but some parts could join more smoothly. Before the point about public money, add a line such as: “This right should still be used in a fair and open way.”
coherence and cohesion
Make each main part begin with a sentence that gives one clear reason. Then explain that reason and give one example. This will make each part feel more complete.
task response
You give a clear answer: you do not agree with the ban, and you keep this view throughout the essay.
task response
Your ideas are on topic. Equal rights, study chances, and needed medical care are all good reasons.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is well laid out, with clear main parts and a closing part that repeats your main view.
coherence and cohesion
Words such as “Moreover”, “For example”, and “Therefore” help the reader follow your ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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