Since money for postgraduate research is limited, some people think financial support from the government should be only provided for scientific research rather than the research for less useful subjects. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

4.5 / 9
✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
Introduction
Recently, the topic of financial supply for postgraduate research has sparked
on the
Change preposition
apply
show examples
public
.
Check wording
interest.
show examples
Some may
augre
Correct your spelling
argue
that the
government
Use synonyms
should only spend the money on supporting the scientific projects
instead
Linking Words
of the other
subjects
Use synonyms
. I strongly disagree with
this
Linking Words
statement that the
researches
Replace the word
research
in other
subjects
Use synonyms
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
also
Linking Words
valuable, and
Use synonyms
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
should help to promote scientific projects to the big companies to gain more
support
Use synonyms
.
Body paragraph 1
It is
rediculous
Correct your spelling
ridiculous
to define the
subjects
Use synonyms
are
Change preposition
as
show examples
less useful. There are no
any standard
Fix the agreement mistake
standards
show examples
or
rating
Check wording
ratings
show examples
to evaluate
the
Correct word choice
whether the
show examples
subjects
Use synonyms
are useful or not. All the
researches
Replace the word
researchers
should
also
Linking Words
need the
support
Use synonyms
,
whatever the
Correct word choice
whether
show examples
financial
support
Use synonyms
or labour supply. Not only
the
Verb problem
are
show examples
scientific researches
are benefitical
Correct your spelling
beneficial
for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
future development, but
also
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other
subjects
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, the subject which studyed in measuring the forest and marine environment played an important role
to maintain
Change preposition
in maintaining
show examples
a sustainable development.
Although
Linking Words
the subject
sounds not
Correct word order
does not sound
show examples
really useful, the
influenece
Correct your spelling
influence
of the research may affect human beings for
entire
Correct determiner usage
their entire
show examples
life.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
Linking Words
this
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
is difficult to define how
is useful
Correct word order
useful it is
show examples
to the
subjects
Use synonyms
and
researches
Replace the word
researchers
that
should
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
government
Use synonyms
provide
Verb problem
should provide
show examples
financial
support
Use synonyms
for them.
Body paragraph 2
Indeed, the
government
Use synonyms
should try to promote the
researches
Check wording
research
show examples
and
subjects
Use synonyms
to the related big
company
Check wording
companies
show examples
,which
to
Verb problem
could
show examples
ask
their
Change preposition
for their
show examples
support
Use synonyms
, to reduce the pressure of funding. The
government
Use synonyms
can hold
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
different exhibitions for
the researches
Replace the word
researchers
to demonstrate their process or
result
Check wording
results
show examples
, which can provide
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
opportunities for them to gain the sponsers by themselves. Since the financial
support
Use synonyms
from
Use synonyms
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
limited
Verb problem
is limited
show examples
because it may
enlarge
Verb problem
increase
show examples
the pressure of funding, but now the
expand
Replace the word
expansion
may become lower
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
Use synonyms
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
can
genually
Correct your spelling
genuinely
provide financial
support
Use synonyms
the
Change preposition
to
show examples
all
researches
Replace the word
researchers
.
Conclusion
To conclude
Linking Words
, the definition of important and useless
subjects
Use synonyms
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
difficult to mention. All the
subjects
Use synonyms
and
researches
Check wording
research
show examples
are important
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
Use synonyms
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
should help to promote to big
company
Check wording
companies
show examples
to
gaiin
Correct your spelling
gain
support
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
State your main view more clearly in the first paragraph. You disagree because all fields can be useful, but this idea needs a clearer link to how public money should be shared.
task response
Develop each main idea further. Explain why work on forests and seas needs public money, what it can do for people, and why a company may not pay for it.
task response
Be careful with the second body paragraph. It says companies should give more money, but it does not clearly show why this means the government should support all fields.
task response
Use one or two more clear examples of non-science fields, such as history, education, law, or social work. Show a real result from each example.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, two body paragraphs, and an ending. However, some ideas inside each paragraph move too quickly. Start each paragraph with one clear main point, then explain it, then give an example.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple linking words more carefully: 'First', 'For example', 'As a result', and 'However'. Do not use 'Therefore' when the sentence before it has not fully proved the point.
coherence and cohesion
Make the final paragraph shorter and more direct. Repeat your view and the two main reasons without adding a new point about companies.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid long sentences with many ideas. For example, split the sentence about exhibitions, companies, and funding into two or three short sentences.
task response
You give a clear opinion and do not change your view during the essay.
task response
The forest and sea example is relevant because it shows that a field may seem less useful but can help people in the long term.
coherence and cohesion
The essay follows a familiar and easy-to-follow shape: introduction, two main paragraphs, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
You try to connect ideas with words such as 'For example', 'Indeed', and 'Therefore'.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: