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Writing Samples
Band 8

(CGPT) Some people think competitive sports, such as football, are valuable because they can gather people with different ages and culture together. Some think it can cause problems because people are from different groups and countries. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Introduction
Some
people
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 believe that competitive sports
such
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 as football bring together
people
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 of different ages and cultural backgrounds. Others argue that competition can cause conflict between
fans
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 of different clubs or national teams. In my view, these sports are valuable because they create opportunities to build lasting relationships.
Body paragraph 1
A shared interest in a
team
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 gives
people
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 a reason to talk.
For example
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, an older local supporter and a younger fan from another country might start by discussing why they support the club or how the
team
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 might perform next season. As they get to know each other, they can share stories about how football was celebrated where they grew up. Over time, these conversations can help them understand each other’s backgrounds and form lasting friendships.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
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, strong loyalty to a
team
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 can create tension between rival groups.
Fans
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 who identify strongly with their national
team
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 may take a defeat personally, particularly when its reputation is at stake. During an international final,
for instance
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, a disputed refereeing decision or a player’s unsportsmanlike conduct can anger supporters. Some
fans
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 may
then
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 shout insults at supporters of the opposing
team
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. If the other side responds in the same way, the argument can turn into a fight and increase hostility between
fans
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 from different countries.
Conclusion
In conclusion, despite the risk of clashes, competitive sports are worth encouraging because they give
people
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 opportunities to connect across generations and cultures. Organisers can support
this
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 by enforcing clear rules against abusive behaviour at matches.

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Task response
You discuss both sides and give a clear view. To make the answer even stronger, add one more clear reason why sport can bring people together, such as shared events or work in local teams.
Task response
Your examples fit your main ideas well. You could make the example of conflict feel more real by saying how match staff, police, or clubs can stop fights before they grow.
Coherence and cohesion
Your essay is easy to follow. Each part has one main idea, and the order is clear. Keep using clear paragraph starts such as “On the other hand” and “In conclusion”.
Coherence and cohesion
Some long sentences have many ideas. Split a few of them into two shorter sentences so that the links between cause and result are even easier to see.
Task response
You answer all parts of the question: you explain how sport can join people, how it can lead to conflict, and why you still support it.
Task response
Your view is clear from the start and stays the same through the essay. The final point about rules against abuse gives a useful answer to the problem.
Coherence and cohesion
The four-part structure works very well: opening view, first side, other side, and ending.
Coherence and cohesion
Ideas move in a natural way. For example, the conflict paragraph shows how anger can grow from a game event to insults and then a fight.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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