The line graph presents data on the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy namely, manufacturing, retail, agriculture, healthcare in the US from 1960 to 2020.

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The line graph presents data on the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy

namely

Punctuation problem

, namely

show examples

, manufacturing, retail, agriculture,

Use synonyms

healthcare

Correct word choice

and healthcare

show examples

Punctuation problem

, in

show examples

the US from 1960 to 2020. The data is measured in millions.

Overall

Linking Words

, employment in retail and

healthcare

Use synonyms

increased considerably over the period ,

while

Linking Words

the opposite trend was observed in manufacturing and agriculture.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, manufacturing had the highest employment figure at the beginning of the period before showing a decline. Regarding manufacturing, the number of employees reached its peak of 20

million

Use synonyms

in 1980, before the figure fell to 13

million

Use synonyms

in 2020. In terms of agriculture , the figure stood at approximately 6

million

Use synonyms

in 1960 before falling to 3

million

Use synonyms

in 1980.

Moreover

Linking Words

, it

then

Linking Words

remained stable until 2000, followed by a slight decrease to around 2

million

Use synonyms

in 2020. Turning to retail and

healthcare

Use synonyms

, both sectors experienced an upward trend throughout the period. Retail employment increased from

approximetly

Correct your spelling

approximately

million

Use synonyms

in 1960 to 10

million

Use synonyms

in 1980, before reaching 15

million

Use synonyms

in 2000.

Similarly

Linking Words

, the number of

healthcare

Use synonyms

employees rose steadily from around 2

million

Use synonyms

to 5

million

Use synonyms

in 1980 and

then

Linking Words

climbed to around 11

million

Use synonyms

in 2000. By 2020, both sectors had reached around 16

millions

Check wording

million

show examples

employees.

ramilahasanova81

Nov 11, 2026

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words healthcare, million with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "presents" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "data" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "fell" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 4 times.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

7.0

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

206 words

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The line graph presents data on the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy namely, manufacturing, retail, agriculture, healthcare in the US from 1960 to 2020.

With deforestation, urban development and illegal hunting, many animal species are becoming endangered as they lose their habitat and some are even threanted to the point of extenction. Do you think it is important to protect animals? What measures can be taken to deal with the problem.

Team activities can teach more skills for life than those activities which are played alone. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

how personal values influence your decision-making process. Consider reflecting on the values that are most important to you, how they guide your actions, and how they shape your interactions with others. Use the vocabulary you've learned to support your ideas.

In many countries today the retirement age from work has been raised. Do the advantages of raising the retirement age outweigh the disadvantages?