Some people say that physical education classes are an important of childs education. While others believe that it is more important to focus on academics during school time Discuss both the views and give your opinion

Few people out of majority assumes that tutoring by coaching classes helps children in achieving
milestone
Suggestion
a milestone
the milestone
milestones
in
education whereas
Accept comma addition
education, whereas
there are others who believe that
concentration
Suggestion
the concentration
in academia plays a vital role during
school
days.
This
essay agrees that academics
is
Suggestion
are
crucial in
child
's life.
This
essay will discuss about self-confidence built by private
training mold
Accept comma addition
training, mould
training mould
child
's studies as well as the importance of hard work in broadening career options during
school
tenure. On the one hand, many private classes tend to focus their intention to improve the inner strength needed while learning.
This
helps the students to widen their studies aspects and be more vigilant towards the subjects which they are studying.
For example
, Thomas Fernandes from St. Thomas high
school
and Jr. College
help
Suggestion
helps
students to be more cautious while learning algebra
topic whereas
Accept comma addition
topic, whereas
he
also
makes sure to reflect on the mistakes which improves their conscience. I disagree with
this
view because it will not embrace
child
Suggestion
the child
in achieving their dreams.
On the other hand
, academy study broadens the scope of pursuing their
career which
Accept comma addition
career, which
a
child
has always mesmerized about. Due to multiple guidance during
school period
Suggestion
the school period
, students start researching on multiple course which lands them achieving their goal of opting a suitable course for themselves which will help them flourish. According to a recent survey, a
child
opts for Computer Engineering because they are familiar with the computer hardware and software. I agree with
this
view, as it will help
child
Suggestion
children
the child
achieve their dreams and grow in their future
endeavors
a purposeful or industrious undertaking (especially one that requires effort or boldness)
endeavours
. To conclude, the
child
Suggestion
child's
success in education is not only depended on private tuitions but it is important to concentrate on the academics during
school
time. Even though there are many
predictions but
Accept comma addition
predictions, but
I truly believe that a
child
Suggestion
child's
success is entirely based on their dedication towards studies which they learn
in their
Suggestion
their school time
school
time.
Submitted by mathewanila791 on

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    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
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