Professional workers like doctors, nurses and teachers make a greater contribution to society and so should be paid more than sports and entertainment personalities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Opinions differ as to whether highly-intelligent workers
such
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as doctors, nurses and teachers should be paid more money than athletes and celebrities whose jobs involve less extensive knowledge. In my opinion, I disagree with
this
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statement as I think that both sides should be equally paid. It is understandable why professional workers deserve a
high
Suggestion
higher
salary. The
first
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reason is that they have to spend many years studying and researching in tertiary education.
For example
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, to become a truly professional practitioner in Vietnam, a medical student is supposed to study diligently 6 years in a row,
then
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they must accomplish more than 3 years of doing research in order to obtain master degrees.
Furthermore
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, doctors and nurses are directly dealing with human life, and
thus
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the pressure and responsibility in treating patients are very high. At the same time, teachers play a pivotal role in both educating and training the young generation. Without them, there will be no qualified professors like doctors and scientists who drive the country forward.
However
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, it might be unfair to consider the contributions of sports and entertainment individuals inferior to those discussed above, which means they are not
deserved
Suggestion
deserving
to be well-paid. In fact, those who work in entertainment areas
also
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devote a great deal of time to practice or enhance themselves
with
Suggestion
in
an attempt to content the audience. Take singers,
for example
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, they have to exercise their voice and dancing on a daily basis to capture the interest of the audience.
In addition
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, despite hard work, not all singers can become internationally or just nationally acclaimed due to the
unpredictable
Suggestion
unpredictability
of show business.
However
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, even if being famous, a huge number of fans could threaten their privacy and freedom whenever going out. In conclusion, while workers’ contributions to society vary
in particular
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occupations, I believe that professional and less intellectually demanding workers should be paid equally.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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