IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The restoration of old buildings in major cities in the world costs numerous governments expenditure. This money should be used in new housing and road development. Do you agree or disagree?

#restoration #buildings #cities #world #costs #governments #expenditure #money #road #development
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The reconstruction of ancient monuments requires huge funding by the government in most of the cities around the world. Despite,
this
Linking Words
 budget should be
spend
Suggestion
spent
 on building new houses as well as upgrading roads. I disagree with the point that funds should be invested
on
Suggestion
in
 residential accommodation and construction of roads rather than to restore past historical buildings.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, traditional infrastructure is
blend
Suggestion
a blend
 of history and tradition of our country. It
inculcate
Suggestion
inculcates
has inculcated
is inculcated
 divine feelings in the citizens of a nation. Some historical places are on the roads in many towns, which need to be restored to avoid any loss of property and lives of people. If these places are demolished by authorities,
then
Linking Words
 a part of history will die out that leads to the loss of cultural values in coming generations. Rebuilding involves
cost
Suggestion
the cost
 of
labour
Suggestion
the labour
 only.
Hence
Linking Words
, job opportunities for workers will rise.
Moreover
Linking Words
, ancient buildings attract tourism.
As a result
Linking Words
, economic status of a country will grow. The money will be invested in building the most famous and old architecture.
Also
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
local people will get employment opportunities by opening shops close to
tourist place
Suggestion
tourist places
.'
Virasat
Suggestion
 e Khasla' in Anandpur Sahib, is the quintessential example of attracting tourists from all over the world, which was rebuilt in 2013.
However
Linking Words
, it is essential to preserve ancient infrastructure. But it is
also
Linking Words
 imperative to repair and construct roads which represents
affluent lifestyle
Suggestion
an affluent lifestyle
the affluent lifestyle
 of the masses living
in
Linking Words
particular area
Suggestion
a particular area
particular areas
the particular area
. In conclusion, restructuring of old monuments
,
Accept space
,
not only raises reputation of a country, but
also
Linking Words
 necessary to exemplify the previous history. Some buildings should be
destroyed which
Accept comma addition
destroyed, which
 can not be feasible to repair.
Submitted by naresh on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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