The percentage of overweight children in western countries has increased by 20% in last 20 years. Discuss the causes and effects of disturbing trend.

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In recent times,
obesity
Use synonyms
has risen dramatically among young
generations especially in
Suggestion
generations, especially in
western countries. I will examine the main causes of
this
Linking Words
phenomenon and some adverse effects on teenagers in the upcoming paragraphs.
To begin
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with, there are myriad reasons why the number of overweight children
are increasing
Suggestion
is increasing
. The
first
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and predominant reason is that over- consumption of fast
food
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. If the majority of youngsters consume fried
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food
Accept comma addition
food, then
then
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its lead to
obesity
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because in
this
Linking Words
food
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contains most calories.
Moreover
Linking Words
, children do not give time
to
Suggestion
for
outdoor activities like football, badminton and tennis and they become couch potatoes due to smartphones as well as television so that they lead to
sedentary life-style
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a sedentary lifestyle
sedentary lifestyle
sedentary lifestyles
.
For example
Linking Words
, before a
decade teenagers
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decade, teenagers
decade teenager
decade teenager teenager
were playing outdoor activities that’s why they keep fit
to
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for
physical
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health but
Accept comma addition
health, but
nowadays with the help of
advancement
Suggestion
advanced
technology they involve only indoor games.
Thus
Linking Words
, due to above factors young generation become obese.
On the other hand
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,
obesity
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has various adverse
affects
property of a personal character that is portable but not used in business
effects
on juveniles.
Firstly
Linking Words
, overweight youngsters
are becoming
Suggestion
is becoming
prey from other
peers so
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peers, so
that the negative impact on
children
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child
psychology with
this
Linking Words
they loss their self- esteem.
Secondly
Linking Words
, teenagers suffer from chronic- diseases
such
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as diabetes and asthma.
For instance
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, world
health
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organisation has revealed that in America, in 2015, 40% children’s were
prey
Suggestion
the prey
of
obese
Suggestion
the obese
who continuously eating
unhygienic
Suggestion
food
Use synonyms
.
Hence
Linking Words
,
obesity
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has
negative impact
Suggestion
a negative impact
on
youngsters
Suggestion
youngsters'
health
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. In conclusion, there are many reasons to increase the
obesity
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and these causes adverse effects on children psychologically as well as physical
health
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therefore
Linking Words
, to reduce the
obesity
Use synonyms
it is required parents ought to join the yoga classes with their children.
Submitted by naresh on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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