TOPIC: In some countries, a high proportion of criminal acts are committed by teenagers. Why has this happened? What can be done to deal with this?

Recently, the percentage of juvenile
crime
increases
Suggestion
has increased
is increasing
has been increasing
rapidly. It causes a significant impact on our social stability. There are
number
Suggestion
a number
of reasons behind
this
issues
Suggestion
issue
and several solutions should be proposed to change. There are two primary reasons why many adolescents tend to turn to
crime
. One reason is that the pace of modern
life
create
Suggestion
creates
the explosion of technology, which makes a huge amount of users are over-reliant on internet and television especially children. These violent films can have a bad impact on children’s actions. They are likely to fall under the impression and imitate the content of
such
film easily
such
as: using alcohol, drug abuse or tendency to force
Accept space
etc
continuing in the same way
etc.
.
Besides
, in our modern society, commercials
also
affect how children behave. Young viewers could be easily swayed by captivating advertisements for junk food or video games, and so may pester their parents to buy these goods impulsively. The
last
reason is that those who under 18 years old are often indifferent to the education of schools and families.
For instance
, in my country,
student
Suggestion
the student
a student
are always warned
Suggestion
is always warned
about the health risks the cigarettes
carry but
Accept comma addition
carry, but
some of them still use it as if nothing happened maybe because of the imitation or being adults ambition.
However
, measures must be taken by
school
Suggestion
the school
and their parents.
Firstly
, educating children needs parental involvement more. The ones who
is
Suggestion
are
have been
are being
father
Suggestion
fathers
or mother has to attention to the thing which their offspring
watch
Suggestion
watches
every day and control children’s TV viewing.
Secondly
, they should examine products which their children want you to buy for them before spending their money.
Finally
, parents are able to take their offspring to the courses where they can have real experience
such
as a criminal
life style
a manner of living that reflects the person's values and attitudes
lifestyle
or what
life
in prison is really and what will happen if they commit
crime
A high proportion of
teenager
being of the age 13 through 19
teenage
crime
jeopardises our
life
and has an effect on young inhabitants
lifestyle
Suggestion
life style
. If we make every effort, we can prevent
this
issue quickly

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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