Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected personal relationships? Has this become a positive or negative development?

#people #technology #relationships #become #development

Owing to rapid advancements in technology, the ways used to communicate has undergone tremendous changes. People now interact with each other through advanced devices even if they are a far distance away. I definitely believe that it is indispensably advantageous since it not only makes people closer regardless of their

position but

Accept comma addition

position, but

also

helps improve scientific discoveries and it aids to save lives as well.

Technology

Suggestion

Technological

advancement has led to the advent of sophisticated communication devices

which unless

Accept comma addition

which, unless

otherwise

would not come

Suggestion

into

existence.

relying

Suggestion

Relying

on the technology, portable devices which use specific

waves

Accept comma addition

waves, such

such

as mobile phones, wifi and radio

waves

Accept comma addition

waves, such

such

are amazing that it is not weird now to hear that humans are capable of communicating as far as Interstellar distances.

Moreover

, portal devices are now easily available to the public enabling them to be aware of each other in every

situation no

Accept comma addition

situation, no

matter how far they are, as opposed to the past when people had to go to their destination physically and interact face to face.

Also

, social media

has broadened

Suggestion

have broadened

interactions far beyond just talking, it is now possible to convey even emotions

for example

through

emojis

an iconic mental representation

images

. Developments in communication have influenced human life positively.

Firstly

, Some people are forced to work far away from their families. Using their mobile phones, they now get news from each other whenever they want and wherever they are.

Secondly

, scientists

are being

Suggestion

have been

able to extend their discoveries farther to lands never been known even in other planets.

Spacecraft

Suggestion

The spacecraft

sent to the mars to deliver us some information about its atmosphere is a good example.

Finally

, communication devices allow saving

people

Suggestion

peoples'

peoples

lives. Accidents and natural disasters are informed to authorities as soon as possible to put proper measures in action. To conclude,

this

is an undeniable fact that our lives are dependent on communicating devices. Nowadays these devices noticeably changed the way individuals interact which their benefits are perceived in almost any aspect of our lives.

Submitted by Serhii Baraniuk on Tue Apr 09 2019

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Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

327 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

technology
interact
relationships
connectivity
communication
online
face-to-face
friendships
romantic relationships
family dynamics
positive
negative
development
effects
formation
ease
impacts
communities
connect
interaction

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Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected personal relationships? Has this become a positive or negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

“In general, the relationship among members of family is looser and looser. What are the causes and effects of this phenomenon?

Many countries import a large amount of food from other parts of the world. Is this a positive or negative development?

The increase in the production of consumer goods results in damage to the natural environment. What are the causes of this? What can be done to solve this problem?

More and more companies allow their employees to work from home or “remotely” rather than going into an office each day. Do the advantages of this policy outweigh the disadvantages?

Not everything that is learned is contained in books. Do you agree or disagree?