Please help with the evaluation of the below essay. More and more people are choosing ready to eat food rather than cooking themselves. Do this development has more advantages than disadvantages?

#evaluation #people #food #development

Ready to eat

food

is becoming increasingly popular over the homemade

food

among people.

This

essay will argue that the disadvantages of

such

development are stronger than the advantages.

This

essay will

first

demonstrate that how the ready to eat

food

is yielding to poor

health

, followed by the analysis of the advantage specifically, busy schedule and hectic lifestyle, is not valid. The

consumption

of excessive ready to eat

food

among

people especially

Accept comma addition

people, especially

youngsters is causing poor

health

issues. The reason behind it is

uses

Suggestion

the uses

of preservatives and various chemicals in the ready to eat

food

to maintain the shelf-life of the product,

consumption

such

chemicals

have

Suggestion

has

an adverse effect on the human body as well.

For example

, in India, those who consumed ready to eat

food

specifically

Suggestion

specific

foods made of grains have faced

health

issues like gastric and acidity and

similarly

who consumed

food

that used excessive veg fat have seen the problems like fatty liver. According to a recent survey carried out in India shows that those who consumed readily available

food

have seen a decrease in

health

and spend 20% more on medication compared to those who preferred self-prepared

food

. Those who consumed ready to eat

food

to avoid the

time

wasted in preparing the

food

at home are

also

seen wasting

time

for medication.

For example

, people often seeing the doctor for treatment of

health

problems caused by the

consumption

of ready to eat

food

which again leads to sparing the

time

to keep the

health

and follow the doctor’s prescription. To conclude

consumption

of ready to eat

food

causes

health

issues which

leads

Suggestion

lead

to more

time

invested to keep the body fit so it is always better to consume self-prepared or home cooked

food

and

thus

maintain good

health

Submitted by abhisheksingh2792 on Tue Apr 09 2019

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

295 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Please help with the evaluation of the below essay. More and more people are choosing ready to eat food rather than cooking themselves. Do this development has more advantages than disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think the government should pay for health care and education, but other people claim that it is the individual’s responsibility. Discuss both the views and give your opinion?

Some people believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health and diet. Others however believe that governments should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

More and more children are accessing the Internet unsupervised. This can sometimes put them at risk. What problems do you think parents face when dealing with their children using the Internet? How can this problem be solved?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disanvantages of giving children this message?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both views and give your opinion.