IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Many people are working at home rather than in the workplace. Some people believe this will bring benefits to the workers and their families, but others suggest it will cause stress in the home. Discuss both side and your opinion.

#people #home #workplace #workers #families #stress #side
It is true that emerging technology has made it feasible to work from home without going to
office
Suggestion
the office
an office
. Many people consider, it is beneficial for employees and their family members in terms of saving time and money.
However
, others have conflicting views that it has become a reason of tension. Both the views need to be discussed. Telecommuting benefits to
masses
Suggestion
the masses
, who want to spend their quality time with family, which is only possible because of technological advancement.
For example
,
internet
Suggestion
the internet
 has made
world
Suggestion
the world
 as a global village, sitting at home
,
Accept space
,
workers can connect with their co-workers.
This
 type of work culture saves time of
traveling
the act of going from one place to another
travelling
 to and from the workplace.
As a result
,
Accept space
,
it will lower the costs of transportation. If one partner do job at
residential location
Suggestion
the residential location, then
the residential location then
a residential location then
then
 other members do not need to buy a
second
 car.
Moreover
, they can involve in activities like watching TV, doing exercise, and reading books, which makes them ecstatic and extrovert. On the negative side, home is not a suitable environment to concentrate on assigned projects. It results in strain on job holder.It has
devastating impact
Suggestion
a devastating impact
 on
employees
Suggestion
employee
employees'
 development and growth
;
Accept space
;
they fail to build good relationships with seniors, which are essential for promotion. According to my
preception
the representation of what is perceived; basic component in the formation of a concept
perception
,
this
 environment plays a vital role in
women's life
Suggestion
women's lives
, who want to indulge in official work as well as household tasks.
This
 helps in
overall income
Suggestion
the overall income
 of a family and leads to affluent lifestyles. In conclusion, even though, remote working provides a lot of advantages
such
 as economic benefit and support for women workers
;
Accept space
;
there are risks of isolation, company's productivity,
choas
a state of extreme confusion and disorder
chaos
 in the family.It depends on individuals that how they get advantages of working at their own
residenence
any address at which you dwell more than temporarily
residences
residence
.
Submitted by naresh on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: