In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. What are you opinions on this?

Across the
globe many
Accept comma addition
globe, many
nation
Suggestion
nations
involve their young ones in some kind of salaried
work
. While many support
this
idea considering the fact that it contains valuable life lessons, a few people still believe that it contains no value at all. I support the
first
notion and regards early working
experiences
Suggestion
experience
with some financial remuneration as fruitful and healthy for adolescents’ development. On the one hand, a few people argue that early
work
may cause distractions for young children, since
this
takes their focus
of
Suggestion
on
the main goal, their studies. When adolescents are paid for
work
, they generally classify it as more rewarding than normal studies,
consequently
effecting
arousing affect
affecting
their studies.
For example
, if a young child is involved in hourly labour at car
work shop
small workplace where handcrafts or manufacturing are done
workshop
, they might start to spend more time for extra money.
In contrast
, their chances of ending in engineering school could be much higher, if they only focus on their school
work
, resulting in a brighter future.
On the other hand
, I believe that early involvement of children skilled
work
Suggestion
worker
polishes, strengthens, and groom the personalities of individuals. All children need to understand the reality of life, especially the importance of money. Only
then
will they understand how much hard
work
was behind the purchase of their favourite toy,
for instance
, a PS4.
Furthermore
, due to less leisure time
at
Suggestion
on
their hands might curb them from indulging in numerous ills of
society, like,
Suggestion
society, like
drugs and bad company. In conclusion, despite the fear of
children neglecting
Accept comma addition
children, neglecting
their studies due to
work
, it is my firm belief that early
work
for children will help in their mental, physical and sociological development and turn them into better humans in the future.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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