IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the above statement? What other measures do you think might be effective?

#price #petrol #traffic #pollution #measures
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Fuel
 consumption has been established as one of the key contributors to rising environmental
pollution
. Because of
this
, some people argue that raising energy prices would be an effective way to protect the
environment
. In
this
 essay, 1 am going to argue that
such
 a policy is futile because it does not address the underlying causes of
pollution
 and other measures are needed. Advocates of increasing
fuel
 costs may argue that in doing so governments may discourage citizens from using personal vehicles, thereby reducing
fuel
 consumption and making the
environment
 cleaner. Consumers, especially in developing countries, are generally
price
Suggestion
pricey
-conscious, and
thus
 the exorbitant
fuel
 prices may gear them towards cheaper and more eco-friendly modes of transport like walking or mass transit.
However
,
such
 reasoning is flawed, because car exhausts are only one of the many causes of
pollution
. Factories' discharge of
effluents
Suggestion
effluent
 contaminates water sources, and deforestation is the main culprit behind land degradation. Adjusting energy prices would have little or no impact on these phenomena, and
therefore
 the view that higher costs of
fuel
 can effectively solve global environmental problems should be rejected.
Instead
 of intervening in the energy market, governments should adopt more viable solutions to curb environmental
pollution
.
First
 of all, stricter punishments must be administered on individuals and companies who do harm to the
environment
. Prison sentences may be given to people participating in illegal logging, and factories must be fined for releasing excessive toxic gases into the atmosphere. These steps ought to be carried out in tandem with educating the public about the poor state of the
environment
. Once people are conscious of the detrimental impacts that they have on the air quality or the water sources, they would be galvanized into action and start to actively protect the
environment
. In conclusion, I would contend that a scheme to raise
fuel
 costs may not bring about the desired effect, and
therefore
 other steps to mitigate environmental issues should be considered.
Submitted by brightfuturehp7 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Discourage
  • Incentivize
  • Alternative energy
  • Public transportation
  • Lower-income
  • Carpool
  • Ride-sharing
  • Congestion
  • Urban planning
  • Pedestrian-friendly
  • Tax incentives
  • Electric and hybrid vehicles
  • Emissions standards
  • Cleaner vehicles
  • Congestion charges
  • Bicycle lanes
  • Sustainable
What to do next:
Look at other essays: