Some people think that modern technology is making people more sociable, while others think it is making them less sociable. Discuss both views and give opinion.

#people #technology

Today’s advancement is one of the main

factor

Suggestion

factors

in our society. Many

individuals

Suggestion

individual's

individual

mentality has been changed due to lots of modern developments. Many mankind

Suggestion

accepts

it in a positive manner that it

have

Suggestion

has

made them more communicating while others not find it beneficial. I would like to share

viewpoint

Suggestion

a viewpoint

viewpoints

the viewpoint

on both thoughts and

also

suggest opinion. All human beings are different from each other, their priorities and personal lives are always separate. Some of them like to socialize,

on the other

hand few

Accept comma addition

hand, few

of them prefer to remain

isolate

Suggestion

isolated

. By the social media, it helps people to stay connected with their relatives and friends. They can do video chats

that

Suggestion

are

very cheap and very convenient, if there is

internet connection

Suggestion

an internet connection

Moreover

the social media like,

face book

Suggestion

Facebook

facebook

, link den and others through which job seekers

also

get opportunities by updating their profiles.

For example

, I used to update my profile on link den, and because of

this

I got lots of calls from different organizations and recruiters. So it is one of the easiest

way

Suggestion

ways

for someone to introduce oneself. Those who are not in

favor

promote over another

favour

this

is due to their narrow

mindedness

or possessiveness. In our daily

lives we

Accept comma addition

lives, we

can see that everybody

have

Suggestion

has

a mobile phone and people like to get involved in it deeply.

For example

, children like to download games, adults are used to working on it or using other applications. So it seems like they

does not have

Suggestion

do not have

time for those who are near to them.

Other

Suggestion

Another

example, parents usually don’t like to see if

there

of them or themselves

their

kids are using mobile phones or laptops in front of them because they think that children are not giving importance to them. In my opinion, social media have both pros and

cons but

Accept comma addition

cons, but

advantages

Suggestion

the advantages

are more as compare to disadvantages. Peoples are no doubt correct according to their

views but

Accept comma addition

views, but

one can become more

explorative

by getting involved in new technologies.

Submitted by zoyaa on Tue Apr 16 2019

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Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

325 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

online marketplaces
mobile payment options
personalized advertising
accessibility
compare prices
decision fatigue
impulse buying
financial imprudence
privacy and data security
transformed
streamlined
user-friendly

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Some people think that modern technology is making people more sociable, while others think it is making them less sociable. Discuss both views and give opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

In many countries today,parents are able to choose to send their children to single sex schools or co educational schools. Some people think that children going to to single sex schools have disadvantages latter in life. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

In many societies, there is a growing emphasis on individualism, with people prioritizing their personal goals and desires over collective interests. Is this is a positive or negative development?

Some people think that young criminals should receive the same punishment as adults. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is important to give children the chance to act independently and make their own decisions from early age. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this idea?

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults.