The growing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the health care system in an effort to deal with health issue involved. Some people think that the best way to deal with this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in school curriculum. To what extent you agree or dis agree?

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Health
Use synonyms
is
biggest wealth
Suggestion
the biggest wealth
of people, but people normally doesn’t realize its value until they face any kind of
health
Use synonyms
issues. It is considered by many people that
introduction
Suggestion
the introduction
of more exercise classes and physical
education
Use synonyms
lessons in school curriculum is
greatest way
Suggestion
a great way
great way
to solve problem of obesity and
health
Use synonyms
issue.
This
Linking Words
essay will argue that why more physical
education
Use synonyms
lessons must be certainly introduced in schools. Highly growing number of
health
Use synonyms
issues like heart attack, blood pressure, diabetes is an alarming situation for the
health
Use synonyms
department. Due to sedentary lifestyle of people,
now a days
the period of time that is happening now; any continuous stretch of time including the moment of speech
nowadays
people forget to do some kind of physical exercise, yoga etc.
in
Suggestion
In
their hectic time schedules which lead to increased number of
health
Use synonyms
issues and
also
Linking Words
population of people suffering from obesity. For instant in India schools keep lectures
of
Suggestion
on
physical
education
Use synonyms
only once or twice in a
week which
Accept comma addition
week, which
is absolutely insufficient to keep students healthy
furthermore
Linking Words
, daily physical
education
Use synonyms
sessions will definitely develop
interest
Suggestion
the interest
of students in sports activity. Therefor introduction of more physical
education
Use synonyms
and exercise in schoolings will firmly give long term and permanent positive results in
health
Use synonyms
of students.
Linking Words
Additionally
Suggestion
Additionally, this issue
this
Linking Words
issue can
also
Linking Words
be solved by incorporating
health
Use synonyms
measures in corporate offices reason
being most
Accept comma addition
being, most
of the people spent their major time at their
wok
activity directed toward making or doing something
work
place and if at work place itself few activities like heath
check-ups
a thorough physical examination; includes a variety of tests depending on the age and sex and health of the person
checkups
checkups'
checkup's
, yoga campaign, cycling, etc.
are
Suggestion
Are
conducted than it will
also
Linking Words
bring some awareness about
health
Use synonyms
hygiene.
For
Linking Words
example some
Accept comma addition
example, some
companies provide free fruit dishes, vegetable salads and proteins to keep their employees healthy and
also
Linking Words
organise body check-up once or twice in a year.
Linking Words
However
Accept comma addition
However, this
this
Linking Words
method have not long and permanent impact as compare to bring awareness
from
Suggestion
of
schooling system
Suggestion
the schooling system
.
This
Linking Words
essay argued that why physical
education
Use synonyms
classes should be increased at schooling levels. I strongly concur my opinion that
health
Use synonyms
awareness at
schooling level
Suggestion
the schooling level
itself is the best way to resolve
health
Use synonyms
problems as it gives permanent and long term impact.
Submitted by dinesh_acharya025 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • strain on the health care system
  • introduce
  • physical education
  • curriculum
  • overweight
  • nutrition
  • balanced diet
  • obesity-related diseases
  • genetic factors
  • socioeconomic status
  • reevaluation
  • academic priorities
  • holistic approach
  • public health policies
  • community support
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