Some people think that school children need to learn practical skills such as car maintenance or bank account management along with the academic subjects at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is widely acknowledged that the primary objective of
school
education is to impart theoretical knowledge and not acquisition of life skills
. However
, it does not necessitate schools offering car
repair or bank account management lessons, in my opinion.
There are several obvious advantages to maintaining the focus of school
education to
the teaching of academic subjects, namely science, mathematics, history and languages. It is a well-known fact that we now live in a Change preposition
on
knowledge based
economy in which independent thinking and Add a hyphen
knowledge-based
problem solving
Add a hyphen
problem-solving
skills
are more crucial to success at
the workplace. Change preposition
in
Further
, we should not overlook the fact that many ineluctable subjects are currently finding their way into the curriculum such
as business management and computers. Their inclusion has rendered timetables full, leaving schools little time to teach any life skills
.
Moreover
, skills
such
as operating a bank account or fixing a car
are not too complex or profound to be taught in an academic setting. People hardly complain about not having
taught how to avail of banking services when they were in Verb problem
being
school
. Financial prudence is usually gained in later stages of life by making pecuniary transactions on a daily basis. Finally
, car
maintenance is an inconsequential skill as most people prefer taking their cars to a qualified mechanic to fixing them on their own.
To conclude
, school
hours are too limited to fit in practical skills
such
as accounting or car
fixing. Any effort to incorporate them in
the curriculum would only upset the study of more important academic subjects.Change preposition
into
Submitted by ojediransamuel on
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task response
Your arguments are well-developed and relevant to the topic. Ensure that your examples and evidence directly support your points, and make sure to address all parts of the question in your response.
coherence and cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, and your ideas are logically organized. Work on using more cohesive devices to connect your ideas throughout the essay for improved coherence.
lexical resource
Your use of vocabulary is varied and appropriate for the task. Consider using more advanced vocabulary and idiomatic expressions to enhance your lexical resource.
grammatical range
Your grammar is generally accurate, but there are instances of awkward phrasing and word choice. Pay attention to sentence structure and word usage to improve your grammatical range.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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