IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Increasing car usage in many large global cities has caused a number of problems. Some cities have proposed banning private vehicles from the city centre. To what extent do you agree?

#car #usage #cities #vehicles #city #centre
Owing to the increase in the number of private cars in large urban areas, it has been suggested by some that private vehicles should be restricted from plying major city roads. In my opinion,
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
 disagree that private vehicular movements should be banned, as there are no sufficient
insfrasture
 on
ground
Suggestion
the ground
 to serve as
substitute
Suggestion
a substitute
substitutes
 and cover for
such
 abolishment.
Firstly
, banning cars from the central business districts of a number of large urban areas will actually cause additional problems due to insufficient infrastructure.
This
 is because several commuters who rely on using their own cars for their daily activities will suddenly be required to find
alternative mode
Suggestion
alternative modes
an alternative mode
 of transportation to enter into the city,
thus
 leading to overwhelming of existing public transportation system.
For example
, simply adding extra train services will not work if the train stations available cannot cope with these new commuters.
Anoth
Suggestion
Another
 point to consider is that there will be devastating economic consequences as many
business
Suggestion
businesses
 in the city centres rely on private vehicles to deliver their supply timely and on
daily basis
Suggestion
a daily basis
.
For instance
, restaurants require daily food deliveries in the same way as florists
needs
Suggestion
need
 their flowers to be brought in early in the morning. The result of
this
 will lead to
closure
Suggestion
the closure
 of
this
businesses
Suggestion
business
. In conclusion, banning private vehicles is not a viable option as public transport services will not be able to cope with the higher demand while it's ripple effect on private businesses may lead to their failure.
Submitted by edechloe on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: