Some people who are been in person become good citizens later, and it is of often agreed that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangerous of committing a crime. Extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #person #citizens #teenagers #crime

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Whilst, many individuals who have stayed in jail become good natives later, and it is the generally these are the best

find

a person you know well and regard with affection and trust

friend

to speak narration about the

dangerous

Suggestion

dangers

danger

of committing a

crime

Use synonyms

stop I agree with given statement stop I would discuss both views in the following paragraph. To embark with, there are myriad reasons why I

claiming

Suggestion

am claiming

claim

that ex _criminals youngster related to

crime

Use synonyms

. The

first

Linking Words

and an important reason is that, it is a better way to wear teenager regarding

offence

Suggestion

the offence

However

Linking Words

, they have great experience from previous of offender life.

Moreover

Linking Words

, reformed offers can tell young people how they became involved in

crime

Use synonyms

, the dangers of a criminal Lifestyle.

Linking Words

furthermore

in addition

Furthermore

, can

also

Linking Words

tell what life in prison is really like.

Thus

Linking Words

, they would help youngster stay away from

crime

Use synonyms

In addition

Linking Words

, while adolescent are indifferent to the guidance given by

old

Suggestion

older

people. Imagine that most of them would be extremely keen to hear the story of ex offender.

Which that

Accept comma addition

Which, that

, these stories have

impact

Suggestion

an impact

on them. Contrary to the statement the alternative to using reformed criminals to educate about

crime

Use synonyms

would be less effective.

Also

Linking Words

, if police officer visit to schools and to talk to young people

this

Linking Words

would be useful in term of informing things about what happen to law breakers when they caught.

Additionally

Linking Words

, some source would be useful for

student

Suggestion

students

the student

a student

to learn

drawbacks

Suggestion

the drawbacks

Suggestion

about

crime

Use synonyms

Such

Linking Words

as educational movies might be informative. In the conclusion, I fully sport view that people who have turned their lives around after prison. They can help to deter teenager committing

crime

Use synonyms

Submitted by naresh on Mon May 06 2019

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

263 words

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Some people who are been in person become good citizens later, and it is of often agreed that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangerous of committing a crime. Extent do you agree or disagree?

Television dominates the free-time of too many people. It can make people lazy and prevent them from socialising with others.

Some countries have implemented mandatory community service programs for young people. In these programs, children aged 16 to 18 do charity work, help old people or work with animals. What are some advantages and disadvantages of this for young people?

Nowadays computer education is compulsory for learners in most schools. Do you think it is necessary or will children acquire these skills naturally from their day interaction with technology everywhere? Discuss both and give your opinion.