Social media is becoming increasingly popular amongst all age groups. However, sharing personal information on social media websites does have risks. Do you think that the advantages of social media outweigh the disadvantages.

others
Suggestion
Others
.
Moreover
, recent controversial topic indicates that social media do have
bad effect
Suggestion
a bad effect
on people’s private lives, which I totally support in spite of its benefit to individuals. On the one hand, social media definitely breaks the distance gap between human, connects us all.
For example
, an oversea student
no longer feel
Suggestion
no longer feels
lonely anymore because one can always chat with one’s friends and make
video call
Suggestion
video calls
a video call
with parents.
In addition
, by sharing ideas or emotional stuff, our voices are heard, which boosts our confidence up and we feel more open to everyone.
Moreover
, information
are updated
Suggestion
is updated
instantly, from international news to local events, friends’ activities, which encourages our awareness of the world, makes us
more engage with
Suggestion
engage more with
our surrounding.
On the other hand
, the drawbacks of the social online platform might overweigh the positive side in my point of view.
Firstly
, people are becoming so addicted to social media that they keep staring at their phone screens, forget to directly interact with others. It is not unusual to see a quiet group meeting because everyone is so busy texting or taking pictures to post on the internet.
Secondly
, our private information are not safe
since
Suggestion
for
database business is getting popular. Every
status we
Accept comma addition
status, we
share, every picture is recorded and used for business. To sum up, we need to take social media into consideration, look at both sides of it to come up with the smartest way to use. If we are careful of what we share and try not to be
addited
compulsively or physiologically dependent on something habit-forming
addicted
to it, we can reduce the disadvantages and really enjoy the benefit it gives, which is bringing us closer to the world.
Submitted by Thanh on

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    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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