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Band 5.5

Modern lifestyles mean that many parents have little time for their children. Many children suffer because they do not get as much attention from their parents as children did in the past. Do you agree or disagree?

#lifestyles #parents #time #children #attention
In these days it is more common for both parents to work due to that they have less
time
 to spend with their children Some think that has
affect
Suggestion
affected
 the relationship between parents and their children and families were happier in the past when they had more
time
 together.I partly agree with
this
, I think we cannot compare nowadays with the past
,
Accept space
,
 a plenty of things need to be considered. Owing to the changes in the lifestyle
.
Accept space
.
Both father and mother need to have a job.It is essential in nowadays, to
provied
give something useful or necessary to
provide
provided
 a decent life for
there
of them or themselves
their
 kids.
moreover
in addition
Moreover
, many things are important now that was not exist in the past.
For example
,
tchnologies
the practical application of science to commerce or industry
technologies
 cost a fortune, to
puy
obtain by purchase; acquire by means of a financial transaction
buy
 a phone or laptop they have
work
Suggestion
worked
while
(often used as a combining form) in a good or proper or satisfactory manner or to a high standard ('good' is a nonstandard dialectal variant for 'well')
well
 in the past
thoes
plural of "this"
these
those
this
 things was not exist, all they had to
puy
give money, usually in exchange for goods or services
pay
buy
 is food and clothes.
This
 one reason that
pearnts
a father or mother; one who begets or one who gives birth to or nurtures and raises a child; a relative who plays the role of guardian
parents
pants
 have a little
time
 for
there
of them or themselves
their
 kids.
On the other hand
, some parents like to spend
thier
of them or themselves
their
there
time
 with
there
of them or themselves
their
 friend rather than
there
of them or themselves
their
childern
a young person of either sex
children
.They leave
there
of them or themselves
their
childern
a young person of either sex
children
 most of the days alone.
this
Suggestion
This
 has a direct effect on
there
of them or themselves
their
 behaviour.
For instance
, children without a father or a mother to
lookafter
Suggestion
look after
 become more aggressive.It is mostly because they
did not had
Suggestion
did not have
have not had
 anyone to teach them how to
behavies
behave in a certain manner; show a certain behavior; conduct or comport oneself
behave
.
This
 is a reason for
pearents
a father or mother; one who begets or one who gives birth to or nurtures and raises a child; a relative who plays the role of guardian
parents
 to try to have more
time
 for
there
of them or themselves
their
 kids. In conclusion, it is
nassery
absolutely essential
necessary
 for families to have a
famliy
a social unit living together
family
time
.
sach
Suggestion
Such
Sach
 as, having dinner out
.
Accept space
.
This
 will have a
graet
relatively large in size or number or extent; larger than others of its kind
great
posstive
characterized by or displaying affirmation or acceptance or certainty etc.
positive
 effect on children.
Furthermore
, parents should put
there
of them or themselves
their
 kids
first
.
Submitted by asd43214321asd on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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