The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #health #future

There is no doubt that the average

health

of the people

are declining

Suggestion

is declining

day by day. Some people believe that it would be below par in coming years as compared to today. In

this

essay, I will show my agreement to

this

view because of people's imbalance life style and increase in

pollution

level

. To embark on, these days, the people do not have proper

life-style

a manner of living that reflects the person's values and attitudes

lifestyle

and it is not at all balanced like we have earlier.

This

is because, as

time

is progressing, most of the people become more and more busy in their work and have no

time

to exercise, which tends to decline in their

health

standards and leads to many

disease

Suggestion

diseases

For example

, in my company, employees are working more than 9 hours

hence

not having proper

time

for exercise because of

this

they are suffering from many illnesses.

Furthermore

, the

pollution

level

goes very high as compare to

past

Suggestion

the past

This

is the reason why we are losing our

health

needs as due to the

pollution

we are not getting required components from the environment and all the natural resources are polluted.

For instance

, to keep themselves fit earlier the people tends to go to the open area for fresh air, which is not possible now as air is more polluted now and the

level

is going

high

Suggestion

higher

in future. If we get these

resources

Suggestion

resources, pollution

pollution

free, we would get better

health

. In short

pollution

is one the major factor in

this

. In conclusion, the main reasons for falling

health

standards with

time

are poor living

condition

Suggestion

conditions

and impure natural resources. These factors

are increasing

Suggestion

increase

time

and hampering fitness

level

in paramount way.

Submitted by deepti.bhardwaj1 on Mon Jul 08 2019

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

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Sentence 2 - Example
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Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

278 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

1. Standard of health
2. Average
3. Lower
4. Future
5. Aging population
6. Chronic diseases
7. Sedentary lifestyle
8. Lack of exercise
9. Poor dietary habits
10. Environmental pollution
11. Technological advancements
12. Impact on health

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Fully explain your ideas

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