Some people believe that children's leisure activities must be educational, otherwise they are a complete waste of time. Do you agree or disagree?

It is argued that
childrens
a young person of either sex
children
should use their free
time
for study purpose or else that could be
waste
Suggestion
a waste
of
time
. I disagree with the statement as there are several
possitives
characterized by or displaying affirmation or acceptance or certainty etc.
positives
involved in getting
childrens
a young person of either sex
children
exposed to
outside world
Suggestion
the outside world
in their leisure
time
because it could be helpful to them to develop both their
phyiscal
involving the body as distinguished from the mind or spirit
physical
growth and
also
mental.
Firstly
, I would like to explain the advantages involved in dedicating their free
time
for works like playing with other kids or
making them to read
Suggestion
making them read
books, planting, or painting e.t.c.
For example
, if parents allow them outside to play with other kids that will benefit them in learning how to interact with different kind of people with different mentalities thereby they will develop
behavioral
of or relating to behavior
behavioural
qualities like how to be part of the society as well as it will help them in
future
Suggestion
the future
like if they move to other places for their studies.
Secondly
, I think by reading books like comics or any autobiographies e.t.
c
Suggestion
C
we can nurture their mindset to think creatively because as we are seeing in various parts of world kids are
making
engage in
doing
wonders like discovering instruments or new softwares and in very early age getting placed in topmost industries and earning
money more when
Suggestion
more money when
compared to
adult
Suggestion
adults
an adult
the adult
.
Lastly
, I want to give an example of a kid in my locality who faced many problems despite of not going out and using all her
time
in education, one clear example is as there is no exposure to outside environment she used to depend on others for every work other than studies and
in addition
for
Suggestion
to
her studies she went to
other
any of various alternatives; some other
another
state and there she faced many difficulties in leading
life
Suggestion
a life
. To
conclude I
Accept comma addition
conclude, I
specifically feel that it is beneficial to help kids in doing any social related works other than studies which will have
positive effect
Suggestion
a positive effect
on them.
Submitted by ml72589 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: