Professional sports people are often idolised by young children. Some people think that they, therefore, have a responsibility to be good role models at all times for children. Do you agree or disagree?

#sports #people #children #responsibility #role #models #times

Apparently, young children often admire talented and famous people especially sportsmen.

That is

why professional sports are thought to be good role models.

Nonetheless

, in my perspective, it is not necessary for them to set perfect examples at all times for admirers. At the outset, professional sports always make

effort

Suggestion

an effort

the effort

to show their positive qualities in most of situations, which has profound influence on children's development.

Besides

, their enthusiasm in training and competing can become

helpful source

Suggestion

a helpful source

the helpful source

of inspiration for adolescents.

As a result

, youngsters will think and act more positively, they will love playing sports and they will harbour

dream

Suggestion

dreams

of being professional athletes like their idols.

For instance

, Mbappe - a very young and famous football player playing for PSG team used to idolize C. Ronaldo - a superstar of world footballer playing for Juventus team. When being asked, Mbappe said that Ronaldo was the main reason he decided to practice diligently to become a professional sport.

However

, no one is perfect, so are the sportsmen. Being perfect role models

sometimes makes

Suggestion

sometimes make

them

stressful so

Accept comma addition

stressful, so

they do wrong things as a way of relieving pressure to return the true version of themselves. Rooney - a well known football player who used to play for Manchester United is a typical example. A few years ago, having been in charge of being a good role model all the time and having been scrutinized by the press made him so depressed that he drank a lot and fought with his teammates to release his bad mood.

In other words

, doing wrong deeds helps sportsmen avoid suffering from mental problems and survive in

this

harsh world. To sum up, I think that it is unessential for the professional sports to set a good example at all times because nobody is perfect and normal people are those who have both good and bad aspects.

Submitted by surekhak458 on Tue Jul 23 2019

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

311 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Professional sports people are often idolised by young children. Some people think that they, therefore, have a responsibility to be good role models at all times for children. Do you agree or disagree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe that children’s leisure activities must be educational, otherwise they are acomplete waste of time. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extend do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

Some believe that exercise is important for health while others think that balanced diet is more important. Discuss both points and give your opinion.