In many countries children are engaged in different kind of paid work. Some people regard this as a completely wrong, while others consider it a valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. What is your opinion?

#countries #children #work #people #responsibility

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Today, we can see that children as a paid

workers

Suggestion

worker

in the different countries. Regarding

this

Linking Words

, some people think that

child

Use synonyms

labour should not be allowed, while other critics believe that it to be beneficial for

Use synonyms

child's development

Suggestion

a child's development

the child's development

However

Linking Words

, in my opinion, children should not be allowed to do

expresses position, direction or location, or point in time

work as it relieves them

for

Suggestion

their

childhood

Use synonyms

To begin

Linking Words

with, it is a fact that the

childhood

Use synonyms

is the most essential for their academic growth by which they can build their career. Regarding of

this

Linking Words

age, pupils should focus on their

study

Suggestion

studies

and to explore their area of interest for the best opportunities.

In contrast

Linking Words

, if students are focusing on the work, they will never be able to identify their real capabilities and will end up with doing the same job in which they are exposed.

For instance

Linking Words

, in the oriental countries, more than a quarter percentage of school level students did not enter in the professional courses like medical and engineering

Accept space

because of their lack of an education due to more interest towards their paid

works

Suggestion

work

Hence

Linking Words

, the better educational improvements of

childeren

a young person of either sex

children

Suggestion

are

the major reason to protect them from doing the job in

childhood

Use synonyms

. Another important fact

is most

Accept comma addition

is, most

child

Use synonyms

labour are usually exploited and mistreated by the employers at their workplace.

This

Linking Words

is the major and

serious concern

Suggestion

a serious concern

as it

adversely impact

Suggestion

adversely impacts

Use synonyms

child's mind

Suggestion

the child's mind

a child's mind

Therefore

Linking Words

, having a bad experiences

a unit of surface area equal to 100 square meters

are

the younger age, sometimes

develope

make something new, such as a product or a mental or artistic creation

develop

a negative mindset in children and they are driven towards the criminal activities.

Similarly

Linking Words

, most of

terrorists

Suggestion

the terrorists

had faced the same situation regarding the negative mindset during their

childhood

Use synonyms

age, according to the famous psychologists of the world. In conclusion, the practice of employing children as a paid

workers

Suggestion

worker

would not be encouraged in any country as it would prevent them from leading an educational and safe

childhood

Use synonyms

Submitted by Dhruv on Wed Jul 24 2019

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

311 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Child labor
Exploitation
Minimum age
Work experience
Survival
Taking responsibility
Education
Poverty
Legal restrictions
Physical toll
Psychological impact
Cultural perceptions
International conventions
Economic impact
Work-study programs
Skilled labor
Unskilled labor
Developing economies
Moral implications
Professional development

What to do next:

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In many countries children are engaged in different kind of paid work. Some people regard this as a completely wrong, while others consider it a valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. What is your opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

As children become adults, their social behaviour changes in some ways. What are the main differences between young children’s social behaviour and that of adults? To what extent are the changes that take place good?

Food travels thousands of miles from farmers to consumers. Some people think that it would be better for our environment and economy if people consumed locally produced foods. To what extent do the advantages of this would outweigh the disadvantages?

In many countries, mainly tourists, but not local people, visit museums and historical sites. Why does this happen? What can be done to attract more local people to visit places?

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answeers and include relevant examples from your own knowlwdge or experience.