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Band 7

In many countries,children are becoming overweight and unhealthy.Some people think that the government should have the responsibility.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#countries #children #people #government #responsibility
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Increasing numbers of
health
 issues are prevalent in young children in recent times. It is believed by some people that governments are liable to resolve
this
 issue. I agree with 
this
 belief to some extent as in my opinion,
this
 situation is the responsibility of both the government, the society and individuals. As the government is responsible for maintaining and improving the economic growth of its country, it must ensure steps in managing and enhancing the
health
 of its youth. Unhealthy children would mean an unhealthy future generation of a nation, which would result in a slowdown of the economy as a whole.
For example
, an adult suffering from diabetes at an early age would not be able to consistently work efficiently as he would constantly suffer from lethargy and mental weakness.
However
,
health
management targeting
Suggestion
management, targeting
 children is
also
 the duty of society and its individuals.
Health
 issues among children would get worse with age and might result in other severe diseases
such
 as heart disorders and high blood pressure. These
ailments
violent or severe weather (viewed as caused by the action of the four elements)
elements
 might
then
 be passed through generations and create a pool of unhealthy individuals in the community.
As a result
, parents as well as other adults need to instill the importance of lifestyle and
health
 management among young children in order to equip them with long-term
health
 consciousness.
For instance
, a family that follows a healthy routine and fitness regime would cultivate these good habits in their offspring and other kids, and prevent these young children succumbing to
health
 problems. In conclusion, I agree to some extent that governments are responsible for solving the problem of unhealthy and overweight children. But, society and its individuals
also
 play a critical role in overcoming
this
 situation.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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