IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Universities should accept numbers of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#universities #numbers #students
In
writer’s view
Suggestion
the writer’s view
, there is no denying that same educational opportunities should distribute between men and women.
However
,
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
 disagree with the approach that the admission to universities depend on
gender
 of volunteers. It is clearly fanciful that the universities should accept the same quantity of men and women on all degrees of educational period.
Furthermore
, the educational
centers
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
centres
centre
 would approve the volunteers based on getting the application. Did a university elect men or women, it would demand sufficient entrant of each
gender
. In actuality, countless courses are more popular with one
gender
 than the others, and it would not
functional
Suggestion
function
 to aim for equal proportions.
For example
, nursing courses tend to attract more female applicant, and it would be hard to fill these courses if fifty percent of the places needed, allocated to men. Apart from the practical concerns, expressed above, I
also
 believe that the dependency of admission to university on
gender
 is neither
fairly
Suggestion
fair
 nor correctly.
In addition
, the best way to rule justice in
this
 case, acceptance should have based on scientific talents and abilities.
Moreover
, in
this
 approach both men and women have the same opportunities, and applicant
know
Suggestion
knows
 that should the work flat out to achieve good grades at school, the would be successful.
Thus
, is a female student is the best candidate for a place on a course, it would be wrong to reject her in favour of male with lower grades or fewer qualifications. From what
have been discussed
Suggestion
has been discussed
 above, we may conclude that the best factor for accepting the candidates is their qualification based on scientific talents
and abilities nor
Suggestion
and abilities, nor
gender
. In one sentence, the more they qualify,
the better
Suggestion
the best
 selection they will have.
Submitted by justin.henderson2 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender diversity
  • fostering innovation
  • educational experience
  • enforcing gender quotas
  • merit and potential
  • individual achievements
  • natural differences
  • gender equality
  • reducing gender stereotypes
  • balanced workforce
  • traditionally male-dominated or female-dominated fields
  • fluctuating applicant numbers
  • compromise on quality
  • diversity aspects
What to do next:
Look at other essays: