People live longer today and so people should stay in the workforce. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

For me, I don’t agree with

this

statement for some reasons below

First

of all, retired people will feel lonely when staying at home because their children are at work. So staying in the workforce will give them

effective way

Suggestion

an effective way

effective ways

to away from

lonliness

the state of being alone in solitary isolation

loneliness

Staying at home not only makes them feel

boring but

Accept comma addition

boring, but

also waste of time

Suggestion

also a waste of time

. Going to work will give them

right way

Suggestion

the right way

to develop medical fitness or just having

good time

Suggestion

a good time

with their colleagues rather than staying at home doing housework or watching TV

Lastly

, people remaining in

workforce

Suggestion

the workforce

a workforce

can contribute to the economy of the country. Having experienced, they can solve problem clearly.

Consequently

, remaining in the workforce is the right

thing but

Accept comma addition

thing, but

we can’t make anyone totally agree with us. Their choice will base on medical health or taking care of their

grandchilren

a child of your son or daughter

grandchildren

Sun Aug 04 2019

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

139 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

life expectancy
financial resources
retirement fund
cognitive functions
social interaction
wealth of experience
expertise
social security systems
dependency ratio
employers
adapt workplaces
job retraining
flexible working hours

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People live longer today and so people should stay in the workforce. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe that construction of new public buildings such as museums, towns halls and sporting is more important than renovation of the existing ones, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.

Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behaviour. Others disagree and think that the host country should welcome culture difference. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Television has had a significant influence on the culture of many societies. To what extent would you say that television has positively or negatively affected the cultural development of your society?

Space travel to the Moon is often cited as one giant leap for mankind. Yet some people argue that this achievement made little different to our daily lives. What is your opinion?