It is expected in the near future that there will be a higher proportion of old people compared to younger population in some countries. Is it a positive or negative development?

#future #proportion #people #population #countries #development

In many parts of the world, the population of the elderly is swelling compared to the youthful demographic and it is expected to outnumber them in the not so distant

duture

the time yet to come

future

. In my perspective,

this

is a negative trend which leads to the financial strain on

society

and lack of available workforce. The

first

reason that a longer lifespan is not

possibly

Suggestion

possible

positive development is the financial strain that it puts on the

society

This

is because as people

age they

Accept comma addition

age, they

become more fragile and they are not as healthy as they used to be

Accept space

as a result

, they require some extra services in

society

. Simply put, most of the senior citizens have some kind of ailments

such

as arthritis or heart diseases which can affect their mobility,

consequently

, public services and infrastructure should be built in a way to adapt to their disabilities.

Furthermore

, not only is the burden on the state, but

also

it is

Suggestion

for

the younger generation as they have no alternative but to act as

caregivers

for their older parents who are unable to take care of themselves owing to potential illnesses. Another grave problem that the high life expectancy might cause is the shortage in the available workforce. If

the large proportion

Suggestion

the largest proportion

largest proportion

larger proportion

population

Suggestion

the population

was old, there would be an economic crisis, as the most of industries would suffer from lack of employee.

This

is because when people reach the retirement age, there would not be sufficient young

jobseekers

Suggestion

job seekers

to replace them which leads to severe ramification for the country.

For example

, many industrialized nations in Europe, including Germany, have

face

Suggestion

faced

these difficulties so that they have resorted to importing workforce from developing countries. To conclude, I would contend that the disproportionate number of

population

Suggestion

the population

and having

more old

Suggestion

older

more older

people may lead to several complications, both for the

society

and the younger generation.

Submitted by msharifielts on Mon Aug 05 2019

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

308 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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It is expected in the near future that there will be a higher proportion of old people compared to younger population in some countries. Is it a positive or negative development?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

interest in homeschooling is becoming more widespread around the world. in your opinion, should school be compulsory for all children, or should families be allowed the right to choose to educate their children at home?

The widespread of the Internet gives people more freedom to work and study at home instead of traveling to office and school. Do the advantages outweigh disadvantages?

Some people think that older employees contribute most to the success of a company. Others think that younger people play a more vital role. Discuss both views and disccuss your opinion.

With the increased global demand in oil and gas, undiscovered areas of the world should be opened up to access more resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree?