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Writing Samples
Band 3

Some parents buy their children a large number of toys to play with. What are the advantages and disadvantages for the child of having a large number of toys?

#parents #children #toys #child
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Toys for children are the most spectacular gifts which they would love to request from
Use synonyms
thier
of them or themselves
their
there
 parents and in return would become
Use synonyms
thier
of them or themselves
their
 most
choosen
one who is the object of choice; who is given preference
chosen
choosing
 gifts. Kids irregardless of age would basically ask various types of playing materials or sometimes gadgets that
leads
Suggestion
lead
 them to become socially aloof and not economically wise. Spending too much time with
such
Linking Words
 a large number of toys inhibits the young ones to have
social encounter
Suggestion
a social encounter
social encounters
 with friends, relatives or
neighbors
a person who lives (or is located) near another
neighbours
. They were lacking memories that they might benefit with
such
Linking Words
 moment of conversation or exchange of ideas with a human being.
Also
Linking Words
, with
such
Linking Words
 increasing amount of playing materials
availa ble
obtainable or accessible and ready for use or service
available
 in market the
oppurtunity
a possibility due to a favorable combination of circumstances
opportunity
opportunities
 to enhance physical skills and critical thinking. Another negative effect of
this
Linking Words
 situation
wpuld
past tense of "will"
would
 be the capability of the parents to provide which would lead to
misallocation
Suggestion
 of
Use synonyms
thier
of them or themselves
their
 family budget.. The head of the family who is the
breadwinnet
one whose earnings are the primary source of support for their dependents
breadwinner
bread-winner
 will
macimize
make as big or large as possible
maximize
maximise
 all effort to make sure the request of
Use synonyms
thier
of them or themselves
their
 children will
br
have the quality of being; (copula, used with an adjective or a predicate noun)
be
 provided even if unnecessary while the mother
qho
the person or persons that; the one that
who
Chou
 is the one keeping the
house fix
Accept comma addition
house, fix
 will put extra time in making sure to put
this
Linking Words
 large number of toys in
proper place
Suggestion
the proper place
. As a whole,
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
 conclude that it is important to encourage the youth to maintain the essential of a conversation whenever applicable and teach them to become wise in spending which would be my reason to disagree with giving kids so
much
Suggestion
many
 toys.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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