Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Hollywood and other
film
industries across the globe are quite popular and the artists who work in these industries somehow represent as
bad role model
Suggestion
a bad role model
bad role models
for youngsters. While I agree that youngsters do not get to learn good
life
lessons from these
film
stars, there are some successful people in the
film
industry
who are skilled and inspired many people.
However
, there are many reasons why the movie stars are bad role model for young people.
Firstly
, these superstars
wear
Suggestion
wears
expensive brand clothes, which symbolize the success in the form of money and even they show off through social media; which in result has
an
Suggestion
a
bad influence on children as they follows these Hollywood actors closely and apt their lifestyle.
For example
: nowadays teenagers started to spend
parents
Suggestion
parents'
money on the branded clothes and they waste their time on social media to grab more followers to increase their popularity because they think that being famous on social apps is
success
Suggestion
a success
.
Furthermore
, these youngsters focus more on social media
instead
of real
life
, that means they change their
life
goal,
therefore
, celebrities distracting them from their career goals and spoiling their future.
On the other hand
, there are a few celebrities who can set as a good
motivators
Suggestion
motivator
for
the young
Suggestion
younger
people. These artists gain their success in the
industry
because of an excellent acting skill, communication skills,
etc whereas
Accept comma addition
etc., whereas
etc. whereas
other actors brought up from
the wealthy
Suggestion
wealthier
families and they have not struggled in the
industry
.
For example
; Jackie
Chan
the longest river of Asia; flows eastward from Tibet into the East China Sea near Shanghai
Chang
is the well known movie star as he struggled in his
life
to gain a superstar reputation in the
film
industry
as well as he knows martial art and he
is post
Suggestion
has posted
graduated
Suggestion
graduate
. These actors can certainly motivate
the young
Suggestion
the younger
younger
generations if they follow their
life
story and their activities on the internet or social media. In conclusion, artists can be bad as well good influence on teenagers, but it all depends on the young people who they like and follow.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • glamour
  • wealth
  • achievements
  • portrayed
  • overshadow
  • influenced
  • lifestyles
  • unrealistic
  • expectations
  • values
  • promoting
  • hard work
  • perseverance
  • inspire
  • positive impact
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