IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Some people believe that capital punishment should never be used. Others, however, argue that it should be allowed for the most serious crimes. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #punishment #crimes
Many argue that
death
Suggestion
the death penalty
penalty
 ought to be inactive.
In
Suggestion
At
 the same time, others claim that it has to be used
for
Suggestion
in
 crimes of
serious nature
Suggestion
a serious nature
.
This
 essay will discuss both views and
also
 shall point out the importance of having the
death
penalty
 in the justice system. One the one hand, people opposing the use of
death
penalty
 sees that it is harmful to the society in many ways.
To begin
 with, innocent people could be wrongly convicted and executed due to a mistake during investigations. If
such mistake
Suggestion
a such mistake
 was found after the execution, there is no way to rectify it.
In addition
, in-spite of the application of capital punishment,
crimes
Suggestion
crime
 rates are necessarily decreasing.
For example
, a recent government report revealed information that crimes
rates
Suggestion
rate
 percentages are almost the same compared to
last
 year.
Furthermore
,
death
penalty
 application creates a violent culture and encourages revenge.
For instance
, there is a case of 12 years old boy who electrified his cat after witnessing an execution of a criminal by an electric chair.
On the other hand
, supporters of capital punishment say that it deter crimes and provides relief for those in hurt. To elaborate on
this
, applying
death
penalty
 sends a message to all people to think about the consequences of their actions as fear of
death
 stop many people from committing offences.
Also
, it sends a message to the victim’s relatives and close ones that justice is served under any circumstances.
Thus
, increase their faith in the system.
For example
, a recent research showed that the terrorist attacks
on
Suggestion
in
 Egypt has decreased significantly after the execution of two terrorists who played a major role in the recent
terrorists’
Suggestion
terrorist
 attacks.
Furthermore
, applying the
death
penalty
 reduces the cost of imprisonment.
Accordingly
, government expenditure allocated
for
Suggestion
to
this
 issue can be redirected to other projects that may benefit the whole society. To conclude,
although
death
penalty
 application raises red flags when it comes to prosecution procedures and creating a violent culture, it is a fact that capital punishment has more benefits to the society in terms of preventing crimes from taking place, reducing imprisonment costs, and creating financial resources for other projects.
Submitted by priyankam1031 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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