Some people say history is one of the important school subjects. Other people think that, in today's world, subjects like Science and Technology are more important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #history #school #subjects #world #science #technology

Recently, it is often argued that

History

is an important school’s

subject

, but other believe that, in the modern world, there are more important

subject

than

History

like Science and Technology.

This

essay will discuss both aspects and draw my personal opinion.

Suggestion

one

hand,

History

subject

could have some advantages for students. The

first

one

, learning

History

could help us

avoiding

Suggestion

avoid

other mistakes.

For instance

, Thomas Edison had failed 999 times in order to invent the

first

bulb in the world.

However

it is

it's

become

more easier

Suggestion

easier

to make a bulb now. The

second

point,

History

subject

considered as an enjoyable

subject

. Despite the other subjects,

History

is different. It includes stories which could be fun unlike the others.

Suggestion

the other hand, other subjects could be more beneficial than

History

subject

. The

first

one

is science

subject

. Science

subject

gives the students an essential knowledge that benefits them in their

live

Suggestion

lives

For example

, chemistry knowledge help pharmacists creating medicines. The

second

one

is Technology

subject

. Students need to learn Technology because it helps them to adjust with the modern

live

Suggestion

life

For instance

, people need to learn using phones to communicate with their friends and families. To sum up,

although

History

is a significant

subject

, there are other subjects that more important than

History

Therefore

, I believe that

History

is not as important as other subjects like Science and Technology.

Submitted by nalurasu on Thu Aug 22 2019

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

230 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

crucial
comprehend
retrospect
gain insights
reflect on
sharpen
evaluate
significance
heritage
legacy
advent
breakthroughs
sustain
sustainability
revolutions
empowered
overcome
transform
advancements
collaboration
cooperation
diversity
fulfilling
promote
facilitate
prosperity
enhance
foster
foundation

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