"Children are facing more pressures nowadays from academic, social and commercial perspectives. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures?

It is commonly said that today’s
children
are pressurized as were yesterday’s adults. That’s true in the sense that
children
are facing harder and harder academic, social and commercial challenges. It is happening simply because of the
ever increasing
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ever-increasing
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demands of life, from the same perspectives, on humans in general.
While
it is important that
children
excel
in
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at
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their age to become successful as adults, they must be shielded from the mounting pressure by maintaining a balance between material and psychological growth. As the global village becomes more and more competitive
everyday
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every day
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, it becomes important for us to prepare for the fight, so to speak, earlier and earlier.
This
is realized by all, which triggers societies to push their juveniles during their learning stage. The other thing
that is
contributing to
this
ever rising
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ever-rising
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pressure on
children
is the lack
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of
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institutional opportunities, especially in developing countries. Now, more than ever,
children
are having to race each other
for reaching
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to reach
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the privilege of higher education.
While
healthy competition is helpful for the psycho-social development of young ones, it is rather unhealthy when the race becomes more prominent than the objective. Of
course
Add a comma
course,
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the objective of
children
competing against each other ideally is
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to brining
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brining
Correct your spelling
bringing
show examples
the best out of themselves. But, very frequently, a child is compelled to compete
for becoming
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to become
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better than the other.
In other words
, the competition becomes a brawl rather than
being
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apply
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a sprint. To stop
such
spiteful struggle among our young, we must first establish a sense of camaraderie within all our developmental institutions,
such
as schools and colleges. Students must contest for academic betterment, not social supremacy.
Also
, parents should get proactively involved in promoting sportsmanship among learners. They must not allow vile aggressiveness and their own vengefulness in the lives of their
children
. To sustain
such
social reformation the government must establish ample alternatives to the traditional route to success. 32 IELTS ESSAY SAMPLES - Band 9 The conclusion here is simple. The
children
today are being put into a ‘
survival-of-thefittest
Correct your spelling
survival-of-the fittest
’ situation much earlier than they must be when they should really be trying to do their best.
Such
untimely loss of innocence is only going to make civilization more antagonistic.
Therefore
we must ensure that personal development may be ushered in harmony and not in vile rivalry.

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • academic pressure
  • globalized world
  • competitive education system
  • social media influences
  • cyberbullying
  • commercial pressures
  • aggressive marketing
  • materialistic desires
  • peer pressure
  • high expectations
  • standardized testing
  • quantifiable performance
  • stress and anxiety
  • extracurricular achievements
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