IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

some people think that people who choose job early and keep doing it are more like to get a satisfying career than those who frequently change their jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #job #career #change #jobs
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Choice
of
Suggestion
for
 the
job
Use synonyms
is depend
Suggestion
depends
 on the mind of the people. Someone begin their career in the
job
Use synonyms
 from
early age
Suggestion
an early age
 and
continuously
Suggestion
continue
continued
continuing
 doing one
job
Use synonyms
 for a long time
instead
Linking Words
 of
other
any of various alternatives; some other
another
 who usually
change
Use synonyms
 their jobs. I disagree that
frequently
Suggestion
frequent
frequency
 changes are necessary for the bright career because sometime small changes give new experience and happiness in life. Sometimes, people start their
job
Use synonyms
 in early age and they do their
job
Use synonyms
 with minimum liabilities and facilities. Once they understand all the work what they do for the
company
Use synonyms
 or organization after they jump to
change
Use synonyms
 the
job
Use synonyms
 position or companies. They try to go abroad. So they can get new environment, more money with good facilities which provide by the new boss.
Moreover
Linking Words
, individuals can get new experience which
help
Suggestion
helps
 to
then
Linking Words
 for future work.
However
Linking Words
, sometime small
change
Use synonyms
 in one
company
Use synonyms
 to another, it proves
disaster
Suggestion
disastrous
 for us. If people
change
Use synonyms
 the
company
Use synonyms
 without any
preparation it
Accept comma addition
preparation, it
 very dangerous for them.
Linking Words
First they
Accept comma addition
First, they
 need to do research about the
company
Use synonyms
 when they want to try for application.
Second
Linking Words
 the environment of the staff, accomodation and location which
also
Linking Words
 very important things. Sometime they
can not
can not
cannot
 cope up with the fast moving life and with the new faces in
Use synonyms
company
Suggestion
the company
. To conclude, we need to welcome
changes
Suggestion
change
 with open
arms but
Accept comma addition
arms, but
, we need to prepare for
innerself
Suggestion
the inner self
inner self
. Sometimes, it
give
Suggestion
gives
 bad experience if we
change
Use synonyms
 the
job
Use synonyms
 without preparation.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: