Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Public
health
is an issue that people pay more and more attention on it since they realize the significance of equal both work and personal
health
. I personally believe that increasing the amount of sport facilities can only do a limited influence on public
health
.
First
of all, doing sport are positively related to our
health
, but cannot fundamentally solve the problems of our
health
crisis. According to the research, most of our length of
life
are determined
Suggestion
is determined
by our
gene
Suggestion
genes
,
although
a healthy
life style
a manner of living that reflects the person's values and attitudes
lifestyle
might extend it
for
Suggestion
to
some extent. Doing sport regularly can benefit our
health
status but
Accept comma addition
status, but
cannot avoid the disease that caused by our
gene
.
For example
, a famous Hollywood superstar Angelina Jolie had a surgery to remove her breast just to prevent breast cancer in advance caused by the
gene
. Only people with healthy
gene
and live with a proper
life
can make a win-win situation for our
health
.
On the other hand
, there are still some measures play an important role in our
life
. We should not only maintain a healthy
life but
Accept comma addition
life, but
also
try to focus other methods to prevent potential damage to our
health
. Due to modern technology and the research in
biological
Suggestion
biology
, we have already made a huge improvement in improving public
health
compared to the past. In the past, people can only judge their BMI by measuring their weight and height. But now we
also
have
body fat machine
Suggestion
a body fat machine
to provide other information
of
Suggestion
about
our body.
As a result
, there might be new index that could tell the status of our
health
. In conclusion, there are a lot of factors that can influence our
health
. We should not just focus on one
measure but
Accept comma addition
measure, but
should have another solution to it. By doing so, we can make a great progress in public
health
.

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • public health
  • sports facilities
  • physical activity
  • exercise
  • chronic diseases
  • heart disease
  • obesity
  • inclusivity
  • participation
  • safe environment
  • social interaction
  • community engagement
  • comprehensive approach
  • health education programs
  • environmental factors
  • healthcare infrastructure
  • quality healthcare services
  • public health initiatives
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