Some people believe that it is essential to include physical education classes in the curriculum for all school age children. Others think that children's time is better spent on more academic subjects. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

#people #education #classes #curriculum #school #age #children #time #subjects

Day by

the the

definite article

the

world become more and more

competative

involving competition or competitiveness

competitive

in every sector like schooling, career and innovation. Some people believe that physical

education

is as essential as

accademic subject

Suggestion

an academic subject

academic subject

for every school age children.

This

writing

will illustrates

Suggestion

will illustrate

the

importantnce

the quality of being important and worthy of note

importance

inclution

the state of being included

inclusion

of physical

education

and academic subjects in the curriculum for all the students. Physical

education

is something what makes a student for active healthy. The students who are doing physical activities like outdoor games will be able handle more stress. It reduces the obesity and keep a person healthy and relax. It has been noticed that, the people were engaged in physical

activites

any specific behavior

activities

they perform better than who were doing less physical

activies

any specific behavior

activities

On the other hand

, some people believe that schools should focus only curricular study. They think that, if you any student engage more

Suggestion

study they

Suggestion

the study, they

the study they

will get good

score which

Accept comma addition

score, which

will help him to get admission

in renouned

Suggestion

into a renowned

in renowned

into renowned

into renouned

university.

Consiquently he

Accept comma addition

Consequently, he

Consequently he

will get good result in university exam and will have

better chance

Suggestion

a better chance

to get

good career

Suggestion

a good career

. In

conculation

a position or opinion or judgment reached after consideration

conclusion

conciliation

, considering

boht

two things or people together

both

view points I strongly believe that even if learning subjects are

essential but

Accept comma addition

essential, but

also

beside

this

physical

education

also

more important which will keep a

personly

Suggestion

person

personally

healthy and energetic.

Submitted by mtbadsha on Mon Sep 16 2019

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

208 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that it is essential to include physical education classes in the curriculum for all school age children. Others think that children's time is better spent on more academic subjects. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learning English is important. Do you agree or disagree ?

Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can be benefit teenagers and the community as well. To what extent do you agree or disgree.

Some people consider prices as most important thing to think about when buying product (such as cell phone) or service (eg. medical treatment). Do you agree or disagree

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money, Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Every country should have a free health service, even if this means that the latest medical treatments may not be available through the service because they are too expensive. To what extent do you agree or disagree?